I rang in the New Year at a bobo $75-a-head fund-raiser for a local arts center with bobo people. E and I were to be volunteers at the complimentary beer/wine bar, but our services weren't really needed so we were told to go and have fun! There were lots of food, fun, alcohol and dancing to be had.
E and I got to go thanks to two people who have basically become our "sponsors" down here in A-town. EK and SK are a really great couple with great kids. Bobos to the core, whether they realize it or not. Conservative, modestly wealthy with artistic bents, S has a band (which played the event) and E headed the committee that put the shindig together.
We met all sorts of interesting people, not the least of which was EK's sister. I found her interesting because she's, by some estimations (not necessarily my own, though) typical of someone of my age range/generation. Damn, am I old enough to start "talkin' 'bout my gennnnneration"? Anyway, from what I gathered, R_ (I never got her last name) is a year younger than E, divorced, without a bachelor's degree, with some small business of her own that she left in the care of her sister's family while completing boot camp to enlist in the Army Reserves. No love of her life yet, but she's still looking. R, I think, reminded E of where she used to be before she took the time to do something radical in her life to find what she was looking for. It was interesting, but not surprising that R was listening to our (E's and my) story with rapt attention.
I mention all of this to illustrate something, mostly to myself. It took a couple of months, and while it still has every chance of going south, my life plan is going along at a nice clip. I'm finally at a point where I can put away some of my meager pittance in the bank. Hopefully, I'll be enrolled at OU in the next month. And, I'm finally taking all the mental notes I've made about the success and failures of my various interpersonal relationships and putting them to good use. I'm surrounded by a cozy web of people who have the same attitudes as I do, and attributes I'd love to emulate. I'm also getting back in touch with personal attributes I once thought had been lost to me.
Seeing these things helped me realize that there are a few things I need to accept about myself in 2004:
- I need to chill about certain things, hold some of my beliefs, "oughts," and "shoulds" a bit less tightly.
- I need to be OK with being 30 and still learning things that a lot of 25-year-olds already seem to know.
- People can and do like me, and in a slightly more-than-superficial way! I can and should, like anyone else, use this to my emotional, intellectual, spiritual, and even physical benefit.
- I still have problems. They no longer define me, but they are a part of me. They are real and need solved.
- I need to (re-)discover the exact place of the spiritual component of my life.
I've been saying with increased frequency that it's been a long time since I've been this happy, usually to and in reference to E. But, it's just quite possible that I've never been this happy, period.
Oh, BTW, see
The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King!! E and I saw it last night. It's easily the best movie I've seen in quite a while.
