Let Old Blah Blah Blah Be Forgot...

1. What did you do in 2006 that you'd never done before?
Got paid for something I wrote.

2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions and will you make more for next year?
Sort of, and yes.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
No.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Depends what close means.

5. What countries did you visit?
In person--none.

6. What would you like to have in 2007 that you lacked in 2006?
More weapons training.

7. What date from 2006 will remain etched upon your memory and why?
December 5th--that's when I officially became a published writer making taxable income.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
See #7

9. What was your biggest failure?
There ONLY being one paid publication in 2006.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
I was out sick a couple of days.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
My 2GB video/mp3 player. I don't know how I ever got along with a 128MB music-only piece of crap. Oh well, it's still handy as a flash drive, I suppose.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
My patient, long-suffering wife's.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
I don't want to go into that here. It'd appall and depress me.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Action bills.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
See #7.

16. What song will always remind you of 2006?
"Feel" by Chicago

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:

i. happier or sadder? happier
ii. thinner or fatter? fatter
iii. richer or poorer? richer--there's actually a small pittance sitting in a savings account.

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Developing my kung-fu style.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Struggling to find someplace similar to my beloved Donkey to hang out.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
I spent X-Mas with the mother-in-law.

21. Did you fall in love in 2006?
Well, duh.

22. How many one-night stands?
Hello--married here.

23. What was your favorite TV program?
Tie between BOSTON LEGAL and MONARCH OF THE GLEN. Oh, I liked DOCTOR WHO of course, but it just wasn't the same as the last series.

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
I thoroughly detest someone I merely thought of with contempt last year. Does that count?

25. What was the best book you read?
Raymond Carver's collection, WHERE I'M CALLING FROM.

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Jazz pianist Jacky Terrasson

27. What did you want and get?
A job at the Big Red School on the Hill

28. What was your favorite film of this year?
JET LI'S FEARLESS

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
Not much and XXXIII.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Finishing the three pieces I haven't finished yet.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2006?
Metrosexual geek chic.

32. What kept you sane?
(a) The wife, (b) a full-time job with benefits, and (c) more or less liking said job.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Cassandra Wilson. But then, I say that all the time.

34. What political issue stirred you the most?
Getting the country moved back toward the center.

35. Who did you miss?
Everyone I left in Ohio in 2005.

36. Who was the best new person you met?
All the folks I work with now.

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2006:

The writer's only responsibility is to his art. He will be completely ruthless. Everything goes by the board: honor, pride, decency, security, happiness, all, to get the book written. If the writer has to rob his mother, he will not hesitate; the ODE TO A GRECIAN URN is worth any number of old ladies.
-William Falkner

38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:

'Cause I got great expectations
I've got family and friends
I got satisfying work
I got a back that bends
For every breath
For every day of living
This is my thanksgiving

-Don Henley, "My Thanksgiving"

Goals for 2007

The main goal (among many I haven't figured out yet): 20 new pieces in circulation by December 31, 2007.

See y'all next year!

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More Backlog

This week, I find myself rearranging and reorganizing for the New Year. Usually, I have someone nagging at me to do this, but I find that the habit finally took. Over the past few days, I've been slowly going through and clearing out all the things cluttering up my psychic RAM. Here's one of them.

During last Turkey Day's trip to Clevesburg, we stopped at a brand new, redesigned Dunkin Donuts. I'd love to show you just how it's different, but alas...



This is one of those things you kind of understand, but still question at a deep level. Trade secrets are one thing, but exactly what do they have to hide? See, now the paranoia about potential hidden weapons of mass destruction starts to become just a touch more relatable.

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Last Week's Reads

You thought because of the holidays, I was too busy to rip off Nick Hornby's playbook. You were wrong (though I didn't think I was going to post this before today). Last week, I read...

• Fritz Lieber, "Gonna Roll the Bones"
• Robert J. Sawyer, "Biding Time"
• J. Robert Lennon, "Dead Roads," "Election," "The Current Event," "Claim," "Opening," "Copycats," "Town Life," "Rivalry," "Get Over It," "Composure," "Silence," "The Pipeline," and "Leaves"
• Susanna Clarke, "John Uskglass and the Cumbrian Charcoal Burner"
• M. Rickert, "The Christmas Witch"
  

I just had to read something seasonal but I viewed the title "The Christmas Witch" with the same trepidation as last year's DOCTOR WHO special "The Christmas Invasion." Of course, I liked WHO better, but this story wasn't so bad. Not at all what the title or even the cover of the issue of F&SF it came in would imply. It was an engaging novelette but stories that try to keep you ostensibly guessing tend to wear me out. The ones that tell you such and such a character or situation is supernatural...possibly. I liked another tale from that issue much better, Susanna Clarke's "John Uskglass..." and I know next to nothing about her JONATHAN STRANGE AND MR. NORRELL. It's definitely on my reading list for 2007--yes, 2007: The Year I Go Back to Reading Novels...Maybe.

The more I read from the SLIPSTREAM anthology, the less of it I like. I can't argue with the plot and pacing Sawyer's "Biding Time." It's a short, easy-to-follow detective story, solved by the end whereupon the bad guy is on his way to getting his just desserts. Only, I found that I couldn't care less about any of it. I never doubted for an instant that the detective would succeed.

I have to read more Fritz Leiber because "Gonna Roll the Bones" rocked. Like everything else in DANGEROUS VISIONS, there's so much more to it than the typical "gambling with the Devil/Death/Boogeyman" storyline. I'm definitely giving it a second read sometime soon.

I mentioned before that I purchased the collection PIECES FOR THE LEFT HAND by J. Robert Lennon. The thing was imported from the UK since it hasn't been published in the U.S. of A. as of yet. The bookstore wanted a little more for it and rightly so. Luckily, I chose to buy it on the day the store was giving a 10% discount off of any book with five or more words in the title. I would've (reluctantly) paid full price, so you know...gift horses and all that. And, it's certainly been a gift. --waitaminute, I guess I almost did pay full price, damn New York sales taxes! Doesn't matter. Needless to say I've been enthralled by the pieces I've read so far. A lot of them could provide endless fodder for the debate on whether short-shorts are too short to be short stories. From the first section, I'd say Lennon succeeds more often than not. Plus, well, I live in the same area he does so a lot of his "anecdotes" from the "Town & Country" section absolutely resonated.

PASSAGE OF THE WEEK

As Joe lowered hs gaze all the way and looked directly down, his eyes barely over the table, he got the crazy notion that it went down all the way through the world, so that the diamonds were the stars on the other side, visible despite the sunlight there...and so that if a cleaned-out gambler, dizzy with defeat, toppled forward into it, he'd fall forever, toward the bottommost bottom, be it Hell or some black galaxy.

-Fritz Leiber, "Gonna Roll the Bones"

Next Week: Now, where'd I put that Cheever collection...?

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What Is Hip?

Me, that's who.

You Know Yer Indie. Let's Sub-Categorize.

You're Avante Garde Indie. You listen to abstract music like free-jazz and Krautrock. You drink too much coffee and you scare the fuck out of the rest of us. We're afraid to call you pretentious because we know that we all just don't get it. There are few of you out there, and most of you will probably die soon.
Take this quiz!





Quizilla | Join
| Make A Quiz | More Quizzes | Grab Code

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The Furthest F'ing Thing From a Chrismas Miracle

Soul Icon James Brown Dies at 73
by Renée Montagne

Morning Edition, December 25, 2006 · Singer James Brown -- one of the most influential popular musicians of the past 50 years -- has died at 73. He had been hospitalized over the weekend in Atlanta, suffering from pneumonia.

Current Music: James Brown, "The Big Payback"

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Christmas on the Hill

The Elmira Correctional Facility in upstate New York wants to wish you all a happy holiday season!

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Today's Good Deed

Simultaneously supported a local bookstore and a local author.

I can now feel good about being a consumer at the height of the season of consumerism.

We'll be away for the next two days. Back Monday (maybe). Merry Christmakwanzahannukah and try to be nice to one another. Except if a stranger rudely rolls up on your table and starts messing with your stuff. That person needs to learn a lesson via ass-whipping.

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Unbelieveable

What the hell possesses people to walk up to a stranger's table--a stranger with earphones and surrounded by books, papers, and a laptop thereby giving a reasonable impression of being busy-- and ask "What're you working on?" while picking up a random book from said table?

And, unsatisfied with my initial response "Stuff," acting like HE'S being put off when he got the response "Personal stuff" to his second query in a tone that basically says, "Who are you, stranger that I don't know from Adam, and why the hell are you talking to me?"

At least he found someone else to accosted at the table behind mine. He's lucky he didn't get a smack upside the head. True, violence may be an inappropriate response to bad manners, but we all know intuitively that people with that much gaul probably won't respond to anything else.

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Christmas Cheer

Here's my Christmas gift to all my friends and instant gratification readers.



Ho, ho, ho!!

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Backlog

I've been meaning to get to this for months.

This is part three of this saga, and a fitting end, too.

Part One was something utterly strange and beyond comprehension. Part Two was a little more understandable.



But with Part Three, the world once again makes sense...

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Playlist

I take a break from my day at the Diamond Mines to bring you what's running through that new mp3 player of mine. We've got the 80s AOR, two of the best modern jazz musicians around, and some indie stuff.

powered by frazy.com

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Bandwidth Conservation Post

Apologies to whoever I ganked this from...

Do you snore?
I never used to, but ever since I spent two years in Appalachian Ohio, all of a sudden I'm sawing logs on a nightly basis :(.

Are you a lover or a fighter?
I'm a lover until someone pisses me off.

What's your worst fear?
The clowns coming out of the mirror.

As a kid, were you a Lego Maniac?
Maniac was the operative word. Comments were made about how I'd build vehicles and robots around their imaginary weapons systems.

What do you think of reality tv?
To quote Blackadder, "Utter crap."

Do you chew on your straws?
Nope.

Were you a cute baby?
I smiled all the time, I'm told. My winningest feature: the "999" birthmark on my scalp.

What color is your keyboard?
Black.

Do you sing in the shower?
Not anymore, come to think of it. And I don't know why, either.

Have you ever bungee jumped?
I wish.

Any secret talents?
I can hum along, note for note, with every horn soli from every Chicago album.

What's your ideal vacation spot?
Anywhere with wi-fi access and my mp3 player.

Can you swim?
I spent 1/4 of my 8th year of life in a swimming pool.

Have you seen the movie Donnie Darko?
Not the whole thing.

Do you give a damn about the ozone?
Sort of, yeah.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop?
It takes no licks for Chuck Norris!

Can you sing the alphabet backwards?
No.

Do you prefer electric or manual pencil sharpener?
Electric.

What's your stand on hunting?
Just don't waste anything, and for pete's sake you don't need to go around with RPGs. I respect anyone who'll go out with a bow and arrow.

Do you like your handwriting?
I'm told it looks like Thomas Jefferson's at its neatest.

What are you allergic to?
Undue effort based on a cost/benefit analysis.

When was the last time you said, I love you?
Sometime this morning.

Do you cry at weddings?
Only my own.

How do you like your eggs?
Depends on the day. But, generous amounts of cooking oil are usually involved.

Are blondes dumb?
Blonds are like any other group of people: a few winners, but a whole lot of losers.

Where does the other sock end up?
In yesterday's shoes.

Do you have a nickname?
Not currently. I have been called "The Last Don," "Don the Dragon," "The Last Dragon," and "Master P" in the past.

Is McDonalds disgusting?
Right after my first viewing of SUPERSIZE ME, I had a Quarter Pounder with Cheese.

When was the last time you were in a car?
This morning.

Do you prefer baths or showers?
Showers.

Is Santa Claus real?
Yes.

Do you like to have your neck kissed?
But of course!

Are you afraid of the dark?
Only after watching THE EXORCIST.

What are you addicted to?
Coffee with espresso shots.

Crunchy or creamy peanut butter?
Crunchy.

Can you crack your neck?
Yup.

Have you ever ridden in an ambulance?
I have this vague memory of doing so once, but I can't remember the details...hm...

Is drug free the way to be?
Depends how you define caffeine.

Are you a heavy sleeper?
Once I get going.

What color are your eyes?
Brown.

Do you like your life?
For once, yes.

Are you psychic?
I knew you were going to ask that.

Have you read Catcher in the Rye?
In high school.

Do you play any instruments?
The trumpet. Ah, the ol' glory days.

Have you ever stolen money?
Depends what your definition of "is" is.

Can you snowboard?
Hell no. And, I'd never try, either.

Do you like camping?
Not particularly.

Do you snort when you laugh?
No.

Do you believe in magic?
If you mean dark, Stygian, eldritch sorcery--yes.

Are dogs a man's best friend?
I guess.

Do you believe in divorce?
Only when tasteful.

Can you do the Moonwalk?
I was listening to Huey Lewis & the News when everyone else was trying to learn. And I feel justified because Huey was never accused of child molestation.

Do you make a lot of mistakes?
The last one I made was about a year ago when I thought I was wrong.

Is it cold outside today?
Not for December.

What was the last thing you ate?
Something's flesh.

Do you wear nail polish?
Only when I'm fronting my Culture Club tribute band called Yes, I Really Want to Hurt You.

What's the most annoying tv commercial?
That commercial where a bunch of girlfriends are out brunching somewhere or at some trendy bar, and trying to non-chalantly discuss treatment options for the Human papillomavirus.

Do you shop at American Eagle?
A 30+ year old man trolling thru American Eagle is about as appealing as a 30+ year old man trolling through a college bar. So, yes.

Favorite song at the moment?
"Runaway" by Bill Champlin.

Who are you tagging?
No one. That's the point of a Bandwidth Conservation Post.

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I'd Like to Thank

...everyone who made this possible.



(Jeezus H. Christ...)

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Invasion of the Party People

I really, really didn't want people over last night. Of course, I changed my mind and my feelings about it as soon as they got there. It was fun as always! But, I'll tell you, after these past few weeks at the Diamond Mines (for a variety of reasons), I've been needing a place to hide and recover every day. Even my usual haunts were useless, between the holiday shopping season and finals week at the Big Red School on the Hill.

It taught me a lesson, though. One of our guests was a man I've been envious of lately. He keeps a strangle-hold on his sleep schedule. Although I'd probably never be able to keep his hours (Bed by 8 and up by 3:30), I liked how he handled things when it was time for him to go....

What...you thought I learned something about balance or somesuch?

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Last Week's Reads: Escapism

I re-read through Nick Hornby's playbook more thoroughly, so as to more thoroughly rip it off. Last week, I read:

• Raymond Carver, "I Could See the Smallest Things"
  
• Raymond Carver, "Sacks"
• Raymond Carver, "The Bath"
• Raymond Carver, "Tell the Women We're Going"
• Larry Niven, "The Jigsaw Man"

All those stories came out of two books: Carver's collection WHAT WE TALK ABOUT WHEN WE TALK ABOUT LOVE and Ellison's DANGEROUS VISIONS. I said last week that I was in a Carver mood. I wasn't so far gone that I delved too deeply into some Bukowski, though. No, Carver's stuff provided fit last week's malaise just right, I think. Sometimes, I think I take to Carver's stories the same way early teen emo-goth girls take to Sylvia Plaith. I think I can relate to the pain of some of the characters, though not necessarily the characters themselves: The wife caught in her grim reality ("I Could See..."), the son who sees conveniently past his own sins to look down his nose at his deadbeat dad ("Sacks"), or the husband and wife who forgets about obligations when more important things come up ("The Bath").

I confess that I read "Tell the Women We're Going" earlier this year as part of the SHORT CUTS collection. (I still haven't gotten around to seeing the movie.) I understand the lives of the characters in what is, hands-down, my favorite Carver story. The ending that I didn't see coming is what blew me away the first time. It really was the first example I read of a story with an ending that was "unexpected, but inevitable."

It's either coincidence, mental gymnastics on my part, or the application of universal truths scattered through all literature, no matter the genre, but the truth of the lives in Carver's stories dovetail with some writers' visions of future society, DANGEROUS or otherwise. Take a close enough look at the lives of the folks in Carver's world, hell the lives of the people around you for that matter. Think of what society has done in the past to try to escape. I'm not talking about the blatant escapism, either--vice and such. I'm talking about societal readjustment that often comes at someone's expense. Folks of a particular race. Or religion. Or sub-religion. Or sub-culture. People who might otherwise be left alone until someone decides they need to bear the burden for another group's comfort and/or security. That's what we see in "The Jigsaw Man." I won't spoil it here, but I'll leave you a quote by Niven in his afterward. He said, "It's only an accident of history that Red Cross blood banks aren't supplied by the death house."

Passage of the Week

A big moon was laid over the mountains that went around the city. It was a white moon and covered with scars. Any damn fool could imagine a face there.

-Raymond Carver, "I Could See the Smallest Things"

Next week: It's genre time again, I think. Maybe some bits from my backlog of F&SF issues.

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Be a Man

via Mushtaq Ali

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Can't Let Go

I've heard it said (but never to my face), "God, why can't you people...I mean, people...let that 'Little Brown Brother' stuff go?"

Because we're always two-and-a-half steps away from stuff like this happening in real life...

"The Terror Alert Levels: A Brown Person's Guide"
by RT Sehgal

Oh, you don't think so? Wait 'til the first Filipino comes along who does something stupid, looking for his 72 virgins.

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Hukt on Foniks Werkt Fer Mee

You paid attention during 86% of high school!

85-100% You must be an autodidact, because American high schools don't get scores that high! Good show, old chap!

Do you deserve your high school diploma?
Create a Quiz

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RIP AmNerd

Per the editor...

So American Nerd's just going to sit as a static site now (and it
actually still gets a surprising amount of traffic for something that
hasn't been updated for months-- people just want to read about
Chicago and beading, I guess).

I understand that this is the way of things, but it's still sad.

EDIT: The spawn of AmNerd lives on: Raketenwerfer!

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Does Anybody Really Know

...how racist Mel is? Does anybody really care? If so, I can't imagine why...

No, I'm kidding. I do.

I haven't seen APOCALYPTO yet. Truth to tell, I'm generally turned off by movies (read: the theater-going experience) nowadays, anyway. But I didn't decide to not see Mel's movie because of anything he said during his rant. Sure, that's easy for me to say. My people have only been stepped on for just shy of 1,000 years, i.e. it didn't go back to "B.C."

But when I look at this issue in this light, I'm even less convinced that I need to get all up in arms...

Then, of course, there is the issue of Mel’s rant. How could I go see his movie after something like that? Simple. I watched the news and tabloids carefully for the last month, looking for any hint that someone came forward saying that they had experienced racism or bigotry at Gibson’s hands. People get big money, exposure, and personal vindication from such accusations, even if untrue. And I saw nothing. Not a single person among the thousands he has worked with and lived with over the decades came forward. Not even anonymously.

Once again, Steven Barnes says it, so I don't have to. Now, does that mean the slate's clean? Nope. But, is he an unpardonable sinner?

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Jackpot!

I just found out that I won lottery entitling me to purchase a gently used, five-or-so year-old Dell Inspiron 8000 laptop for $50 from the IT department of my place of work.

But the choice: Keep it for myself as a backup server (Hey, 20GB of hard drive and 900mHz processing is nothing to scoff at) or give it (docking station and all) to my computer-less sister.

Or, sell it to one of the five people at work who've made me offers and gouge the hell out of 'em...?

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I'd Do the Same Thing

From scans_daily.

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What Have We Learned?

I wish I could say my hazy memory of Paul Hardcastle's "19" resurfaced when I heard this NPR report. But it didn't. It pops in and out of my head at random, but it finally stuck after I heard...

Soldiers Say Army Ignores, Punishes Mental Anguish
by Daniel Zwerdling

All Things Considered, December 4, 2006 · Army studies show that at least 20 percent to 25 percent of the soldiers who have served in Iraq display symptoms of serious mental-health problems, including depression, substance abuse and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). Administration officials say there are extensive programs to heal soldiers both at home and in Iraq.

But an NPR investigation at Colorado's Ft. Carson has found that even those who feel desperate can have trouble getting the help they need. In fact, evidence suggests that officers at Ft. Carson punish soldiers who need help, and even kick them out of the Army.

What've we learned? I'd say two things: jack and shit.

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Downer

It looks like The Wife's income is going to get cut in half next semester at The Other School on the Hill. I'll tell you, she didn't waste to much time. She's on the hustle, even now, looking at leads.

We're not gonna starve or anything, not even close (at least not for a couple of months). We may have to do without new high-end consumer electronics after the new year, but still...

EDIT: What is it with all these people conducting their business off-hours? When E got the email informing her about her one section being closed, it was dated Saturday afternoon. What, the dude was chilling out on his couch when he realized, "Ooh, damn...I knew I forgot something?"

And just now, well after business hours, she gets an email about a potential lead? I mean, I do freelance stuff, so I understand emailing at all hours, but jeez.

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Moonbase Beta

Thanks to Blogger beta, I...

• Got tags on posts going back to late '05. Still got a lot to go.
• Edited some tags
• Got updated versions of all the widgets I had on my old template

What can I say? It's some nifty stuff they got on here, now. I've had to slap my hand away from all the full length del.icio.us and YouTube widgets I could potentially cram into my sidebar.

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Alpha Beta Gaga, Part Deux

I have to admit, I was about to give up blogging. Not necessarily because I ran out of things to talk about. But, I needed to make this thing useful again, a means through which I can take care of my bid'ness.

After three years, it became pretty useless as a means of storing and linking information for me or anyone else to review later, unless you wanted to troll through the archive pages. Seriously, I was dreading putting anything potentially valuable on this thing for fear it'd just get lost...

...until Blogger in Beta came along.

Now, I almost don't need del.icio.us or Backpack anymore. Between effortlessly integrating third-party apps, manipulating the template, and organizing the output however I might want it with the labels feature...well, I might actually come here more often. This is my 146th post for '06. Look at those past years. Yeah, provided this thing helps me the way I want it to, I'll definitely be updating more often.

So, yes...there's a new look, new features, and all sorts of idiocy to be documented and catalogued. Eh, who needs WordPress, anyway?

Caveat Emptor:

1. I turned comment moderation on--sorry.
   
2. Be aware that the categories listed don't yet cover every single post.
   
3. Your browser's mileage my vary.

I gotta get to bed. I've got a long, early day tomorrow.

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Last Week's Reads

I admit it. This week I didn't even crack Nick Hornby's playbook open. I'm just winging it.

Last week, I read:

• Alan Dean Foster, "Venting"
  
• Isaac Szpindel, "From Gehenna"
  
• Brian W. Aldiss, "The Night That All Time Broke Out"
  
• Me, "The Evil of the Recidivist"
  
• Howard Rodman, "The Man Who Went to the Moon--Twice"
  
• Philip K. Dick, "Faith of Our Fathers

A few weeks ago, I shelled out $7.99 for a paperback anthology, SLIPSTREAMS, edited by Martin H. Greenberg & John Helfers. I was aquainted with some of the stories in the more "literary" end of the style, so I thought this would be a chance to see some things that were decidedly closer to the genre end.

The first tale I read, "Venting," was very straightforward and complete, if simple. The little I know about the main character is everything I need to. I didn't care much for "From Gehenna," but that wasn't Szpindel's fault. True, I saw the ending coming a mile away (especially with the "subtle" blurb on the back cover). But after last week's double shot of Jack the Ripper stories from DANGEROUS VISIONS by Bloch and Ellison, I was worn out.

Honestly, I'm not too thrilled about what I've read so far, but I'm only two stories in. The only reason the book interested me in the first place is because I'm interested in exploring the whole Slipstream style. Hence, the attempt that was made in "The Evil of the Recidivist." Though you could say that it failed to the extent that the story could be labeled strictly "sci-fi."

Maybe it was the week. It was hellish at work. Chalk it up to the inevitable atmosphere of an Ivy League school during finals week. That could be why "All Time Broke Out" was another one I didn't "get." Yes, I understood the plot, especially after reading the forward and afterward. But I really wasn't in the mood for a story about temporal physics gone awry.

"Went to the Moon" was my favorite of the bunch. The sci-fi element wasn't obvious until near the end, but that just goes to show how a compelling story can sometimes outweigh other considerations in the hands of a master.

"Faith of Our Fathers" is by far the most interesting "What If the Wrong Side Won the Cold War" stories I've ever read. The truth I took away from it concerns how, then and now, politics is sometimes the least of our problems.

PASSAGE OF THE WEEK

"Ugh glumph hum herm morm glug humk," the woman muttered.

Which means, roughly translated from the Old Stone, "Why the heck does this always happen to mankind just when he's on the goddam point of getting civilised again?"

-Brian Aldiss, "The Night That All Time Broke Out"

Next week: I've been in a Charles Bukowski/Raymond Carver mood this past week. It's time to indulge, I think.

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I'm Gonna Add Some Bottom

Formerly Known As "My Weekly Personality Analysis," thanks to the new labels feature.

With which great bass player do you most identify? Jaco Pastorius Early career backing the Temptations and Supremes. Moved on to work with Pat Metheny and Weather Report. Probably the best technician ever to play the bass.

Click Here to Take This Quiz Brought to you by YouThink.com quizzes and personality tests.

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My Weekly Personality Analysis...

no longer exists. Oh, I'll still be doing weekly memes and they'll be available wherever you see the personality analysis label.

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Alpha Beta Gaga

I made the switch to Blogger beta. I'll be exploring and fiddling, so forgive any mess that might ensue.

EDIT: I went back and tagged/labeled most of "My Weekly Personality Analysis" posts. But that's as far as I'm gonna go.

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Last Week's Reads

Dusting off, but not opening, choosing to go strictly by my fogged, hazy memories of Nick Hornby's playbook, I give you last week's reads.

When I was with the family over the Turkey Day holiday, E and I made the trip to Half-Price Books. There are a fair amount of used bookstores in Ithaca, some that really do re-sell books at half-off. But a lot of the prices at HPB are more than half-off, which is always nice on the wallet. Aside from an audiobook copy of Robert McKee's STORY, I picked up copies of Harlan Ellison's infamous anthologies DANGEROUS VISIONS and AGAIN, DANGEROUS VISIONS. I was actually going to pick up a trade paperback copy of the former, but E suggested I pick up the hardback version with "the swanky cover," so I figured I might as well pick up the second one, too.



Anyway, everything last week came from DANGEROUS VISIONS, which I've been reading pretty much in order so far, except for having temporarily skipped the novella "Riders of the Purple Wage" by Philip José Farmer. Thus...

• Lester del Rey, "Evensong"
• Robert Silverberg, "Flies"
• Frederik Pohl, "The Day After the Day the Martians Came"
• Miriam Allen deFord, "The Malley System"
• Robert Bloch, "A Toy for Juliette"
• Harlan Ellison, "The Prowler in the City at the Edge of the World"

I know a lot of humanist-types who'd really get a kick out of the story "Evensong," the plot of which could be interpreted as showing the ultimate expression of the human potential. The spiritually-minded, however, could interpret that same plot as a caution of the consequences of the same.

"Flies" is undoubtedly the best human-altered-by-aliens story I've ever read, bar none. The elements are pretty shocking for something written in the sixties (which was the point of the anthology). I won't even describe them; you'll have to read it to believe it. I'd almost describe it as a horror story, but no one in the tale is as horrified as the reader.

What if, as Pohl wrote in his story's afterward (each story except for one has a forward by Ellison and an afterward by the author), sci-fi really can make all men to think of each other as brothers, "at least in the face of a very large universe which is very likely to contain creatures who are not men at all"? Don't be fooled, though. "The Day After the Day the Martians Came" doesn't convey that message directly. Rather, it clearly and succinctly illustrates the ugliness of man's often negative reactions to "the other."

It was refreshing to see a 40 year-old story written by a female (Remember: these stories were written in the 60s. You think sci-fi's dominated by males now, consider 1967.) that, in a graphic and pointed way, dealt with the "softer" sciences. This is exactly the sort of story that found the resurgence expressed in THE HARD SCI-FI RENAISSANCE. It's my favorite story of the lot, so far.

"A Toy for Juliette" was written at Ellison's behest as a sequel to a story Bloch wrote in 1943 called "Yours Truly, Jack the Ripper." Ellison then responsed with a story that picked up where Bloch left off, "The Prolwer in the City..." which is a perfect example of the sort of "conversation" that today's writers like Link or Doctorow write about (pardon me for being too lazy to Google various examples).

PASSAGE OF THE WEEK:
I offer two, having failed to add one last time. First, in this week's reading...

The city was a complex artery, the people were the blood that flowed icily through the artery. They were a gestalt with one another, forming a unified whole. it was a city shining in permanence, eternal in concept, flinging itself up in a formed and molded statement of exaltation; most modern of all modern structures, conceived as the pluperfect residence for the perfect people. The final end-result of all sociological blueprints aimed at Utopia.

-Harlan Ellison, "The Prowler in the City at the Edge of the World"

Typically, I offer these snippets without comment, but in this case I just have to note that it's a description as succinctly written as that by Garc&iactute;a-Márquez in the opening of "Big Mama's Funeral," even if the styles are different. What I mean to say is, that same magic is there.

The second is from last week's "Guy de Maupassant" by Isaac Babel, his most popular quote, in context:

I began to speak of style, of the army of words, of the army in which all kinds of weapons may come into play. No iron can stab the heart with such force as a period put just at the right place. She listened with her head down and her painted lips half open. In her hair, pressed smooth, divided by a parting and looking like patent leather, shone a dark gleam. Her legs in tight-fitting stockings, with their strong soft calves, were planted wide apart on the carpet.

Next week: More from DANGEROUS VISIONS with maybe one or two other things mixed in.

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Miscellany

1
All of my electronics have now moved into the 21st century. I can backup my laptop five times over. And I can plug a total of 8 USB devices into it, including my video/mp3/FM radio player.

I don't know how I ever got by with that 128MB piece of crap player I had. This thing has been my saving grace in a crowded space with the family during Turkey Day, on bus rides with stressed out students from the Big Red School on the Hill, not to mention zoo-like grocery stores.

2
Nonfiction audiobooks...I'm now addicted.

3
There's a nearby group, apparently (I may have mentioned this before) who apparently work out at a local facility with sticks and wearing sarongs. My co-worker who works out there approached them and told them about someone who might be interested (namely me). They tried, it seemed, to put him off first, probably thinking I was someone from "Kim's Ninja School" at the mall or something. They lightened up a bit when he told them I was someone who had a bit of experience with what they were doing. Anyway, they were supposed to give my co-worker information to give me, but on the night they were going to do that, they blew him off.

Eh, screw it. I work with someone who knows this guy and who offered to put in a word for me. He's in Cortland, but that's not too, too far away.

4
This next week, I'm told, will absolutely suck at work. That's okay, though. Like I always say, that's why they call it work.

5
Steven Barnes already said it, so I don't have to...

I don’t know about Michael Richard’s actions, aside from doing something that has probably damaged his life and career. He may be an actual raving racist…but in my experience, most real racists are more careful with their speech. They believe they are walking in enemy territory, where the Jews run the media, using Blacks as footsoldiers. They don’t openly rant like that. Of course, maybe he’s just a STUPID racist. My mind is open to possibilities.

6
There is NOOOO...number 6.

7
They all laughed at me after Timothy Treadwell and they thought what happened to Steve Irwin was a mere accident. But I've said it before and I'll say it again--the animals are rising up!

Orca returns to S.D. tank after attack
By ALLISON HOFFMAN, Associated Press Writer Thu Nov 30, 6:36 PM ET

SAN DIEGO - Some days, killer whales just wake up on the wrong side of the pool. A 2 1/2-ton orca that dragged a trainer underwater during a show at SeaWorld may have been put out by a spat with another whale, grumpy because of the weather or just irritable from a stomach ache, according to marine mammal experts.

Or, maybe it's letting us know just how close the revolution is.

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My Weekly Personality Analysis

I only lie for the sake of consistency. Anyway...

You are the Hanged Man

Self-sacrifice, Sacrifice, Devotion, Bound.

With the Hanged man there is often a sense of fatalism, waiting for something to happen. Or a fear of loss from a situation, rather than gain.

The Hanged Man is perhaps the most fascinating card in the deck. It reflects the story of Odin who offered himself as a sacrifice in order to gain knowledge. Hanging from the world tree, wounded by a spear, given no bread or mead, he hung for nine days. On the last day, he saw on the ground runes that had fallen from the tree, understood their meaning, and, coming down, scooped them up for his own. All knowledge is to be found in these runes.

The Hanged Man, in similar fashion, is a card about suspension, not life or death. It signifies selflessness, sacrifice and prophecy. You make yourself vulnerable and in doing so, gain illumination. You see the world differently, with almost mystical insights.

What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.

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