Good points about today: Got some gas in the car, $6 in my pocket, a girl who loves me, and the usual (roof over head, food, etc.) things to be grateful for.
Bad points about today: The depression I'm in having to make literally the choice between which side of the Ninth Circle of Inferno I want to sleep on with respect to my money situation. I hate it when I get this way -- one snag and I want to crawl into my Cancer-ridden (the sign, that is) shell. And all when I have plans and goals to continue to carry out.
There have been more than a few people in my life who've been very supportive of me when I get this way, E being the latest (and the best!). But an ex of mine once pointed out the definite down side to always having to "have your mourning period" whenever something hits hard enough.
To be sure, there are moments when I wish I could mute my emotions enough to keep going in the face of trials. I've found out the hard way that while I'm not the only one in the world who reacts that way, the world doesn't stop while people such as us stop to get ourselves "collected."
All this leaves me wondering just what it'll take for me to "grow up." And how to "grow up." Where's the line between not being numb to your feelings and not being paralyzed by them?
Bad points about today: The depression I'm in having to make literally the choice between which side of the Ninth Circle of Inferno I want to sleep on with respect to my money situation. I hate it when I get this way -- one snag and I want to crawl into my Cancer-ridden (the sign, that is) shell. And all when I have plans and goals to continue to carry out.
There have been more than a few people in my life who've been very supportive of me when I get this way, E being the latest (and the best!). But an ex of mine once pointed out the definite down side to always having to "have your mourning period" whenever something hits hard enough.
To be sure, there are moments when I wish I could mute my emotions enough to keep going in the face of trials. I've found out the hard way that while I'm not the only one in the world who reacts that way, the world doesn't stop while people such as us stop to get ourselves "collected."
All this leaves me wondering just what it'll take for me to "grow up." And how to "grow up." Where's the line between not being numb to your feelings and not being paralyzed by them?
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