ONCE UPON A TIME IN COLUMBUS ATHENS

ITEM ONE
Upon careful deliberation (read: cruised the webpage and decided, "Wtf"), I decided to email OU's mixed martial arts club. I'm told I'm welcome to join even though I'm not officially a student yet, for $5 a session. Not too bad, I'd say. Once I'm matriculated, it'll be $15 per quarter. I'm going to check out the next meeting this Thursday. They're finishing up the quarter getting ready for next quarter where they're going to focus on some kali, muay Thai and maybe some BJJ.

E is all excited for me, because she knows that kali and muay Thai are the two arts I decided to train in once I got at least one black belt/sash/whatever.

ITEM TWO
Last Saturday, I accompanied E to her ta'i-chi class. It was some very interesting stuff. Afterward, she introduces me to both of her instructors. Now, E's kinda funny when it comes to my martial arts. She gets all frazzled every time I joke privately about "breaking my foot off in someone's @$$" whenever people check her out or premeditating a self-defense scenario while we're in a crowd. But when discussing it in public, she's all like "Yeah, he knows tae kwon do and kung fu, and he's really good, too!" after I've spent minutes trying to downplay my knowledge. Sure, I joke a lot, but I'm never in any mood to be challeneged by someone who identifies too closely with the movie Billy Jack.

Anyway, she just has to drop the fact that I know kung fu and of course, the instructor just has to see me do some. I'm like, "Ohhhhhhhh, crap." Well, I acquiese, since I'm in "his house," so to speak and do my white sash form. He genuinely seemed impressed and complimented my teachers (yay, Mrs. R!!). He and I then get caught up discussing martial arts for the next half-hour after his class. We demonstrated a few techniques and stances for each other. Let me at this time, reiterate my respect for ta'i chi as a combat art. The dude demonstrated how with one hand on my chest and shifting his weight forward how he could knock me back a few steps.

So, I guess ta'i-chi will be my next martial art in line :).

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LYRIC OF THE DAY

One shoe on, one shoe off
Nothing in life is decideable, wouldn't you know
Nothing's supposed to be easy
Take one day at a time
Ain't no need to hurry
Realize where you are
And where you're going to

Follow Me by James Pankow and David Foster
perf. by Chicago

A couple of days ago, I found out that OU in fact does have a program in community counseling. The time frame is shorter, and well, it's the degree that I was after in my first attempt at graduate school.

Now, I just need to get my game on and carry this plan through to fruition. I need to work past all the baggage, real and imaginary, that's stopping me, and take hold of this second chance.

The one factor out of my control -- Will I get in? I ask this knowing there's but one way to find out.

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MY WEEKLY PERSONALITY ANALYSIS

Ah'll be running around und tare-minading de girly cockroaches, ya.


Which Survivor of the Impending Nuclear Apocalypse Are You?
A Rum and Monkey joint.

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FIRST DAN OR BUST

Well, as I've intimated by now in various posts, it seems to be bust for the time being.

The summary of my situation: My living situation changed, as the friend who was graciously providing me with a place to stay could, through no fault of his own, no longer afford to be gracious. To quote his paraphrase of Malachi 2:16, "God hates divorce."

Therefore, I took this as God's/destiny's/fate's/the universe's way of telling me to go ahead and do something I've been pondering for weeks -- to move 90 miles away to be with E. After all, when all is said and done, to paraphrase Gladys Knight,

I'd rather live with her world
Than live without her in mine

Now, there is more to it than that. It turns out that I stand a better-than-even chance of entering grad school here, and finally finishing off that pesky masters degree that I've been putting off.

But, it is a shame after I just made it to first gup. I was all gung-ho about barreling forward to black belt. I learned the first 1/3 of one of my required forms, chung moo. Mrs. R was looking forward to a time when she'd be able to get a kung-fu class going again. Mr. R wanted to find time to train with me personally.

But, now I'm in Athens with a vehicle that's unreliable at best -- I wore it down with weekly trips between Columbus and Athens for the past few months. I don't want to get flabby, and I don't want to lose the little I just regained, with regard to training.

So, I've got a few possibilities:

A) Simply resolve to make a 1-2x/month pilgrimage up to Columbus to train. It's not unheard of. I remember a girl who went to my old alma mater the University of Dayton after college and came back once a week for awhile.

B) I could just find another martial art. This is my least favorite option, because being so close to black belt (TKD) and black sash (KF), I'd really hate to start with something else now, at least until I've reached those levels in at least one of my current martial arts.

C) Ohio University has a mixed martial arts club that I could, in theory, check out. Their website says that the "majority" of their members are OU students, implying that some aren't. Now, I'm not a student quite yet, but assuming I could get in, would it be worth my time and expense?

Decisions, decisions.

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GAME PLAN

I think I know what I'm doin'
But I haven't been doin' it right
It seems like every time I turn around
I find myself feeling uptight
Every once in awhile I see
The questions and the answer
Is before me
Misery isn't free
I gotta be free

The Sons, Misery Isn't Free

So, today is my first (virtually-) stress-free day down here in my new abode. I still feel some of the pangs of mental and physical exhaustion, but slowly, day by day, I've managed to integrate myself into E's space. I cooked dinner for the first time for her last night, some throw-together non-Mexican tasting wannabe chicken fajitas. They were tasty, nonetheless.

Ok, so I'm down here, relatively settled in and some part-time hours starting tomorrow. I'll also get a bit of money in tomorrow, too. But, now I need to start thinking ahead a bit. I want to start the ball rolling as far as getting into school here at OU. I want to go ahead and start a masters/Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology. However, right now it just isn't in the Life Plan to spend the next five to seven years down here, at least if I want to spend them with E. Now, there seems to be a minimum requirement of time to be spent here at the Athens campus, so I'll definitely be exploring the option of doing that minimum time and finishing somewhere else.

And, on top of it all, I need a much better job than what I have now.

What I need, above all else, is patience with myself and diligence. I can never seem to balance those two things out.

I guess what this means, at least in the forseeable future, is that "First Dan or Bust" is bust for the time being :(. Sucks, I know, but first dan really isn't important in the big scheme of things at this present time.

But, I'm finally beginning to realize just how many good things I have in life in spite of all the negative.

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HA! DEATH TO THE INFIDELS

CNN.com - NBC cancels 'Coupling' - Nov. 3, 2003

The link will only last until the 17th, so enjoy the good news while it lasts!

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LATE MUSING

I should've posted this over the weekend. I just wanted to mention how great it was that E and I went on our first movie date last Friday -- we saw Kill Bill!

And, it was her idea! How cool is that? It was a mere week ago that I counseled a fellow against taking a girl out to see a Quentin Tarantino flick. Hey, I chalk it up to E's background in film. She seems so unimpressed by the whole "chick flick" thing.

Yep, if I didn't know if I was in love before, I know now :)

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FIDDLIN'

I took E's advice and put the tagboard at the top of the links column. We'll see if I get anymore scribble.

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STRAIGHT COLD PLAYA

So, I didn't go with the Supersoulfighter costume for the big Athens Halloween festival last night. No, yesterday, I actually went out in two costumes. The first was IMO, the most realistic pimp costume that was at the fest last night. I had the wig, colored glasses, and genuine vintage 1970something clothing, including a tacky-@$$ two-tone brown shirt and E's fly leather coat that would make Richard Roundtree himself green with envy.

Athens definitely lived up to its infamous reputation last night, that's for sure.

E and I hosted a couple of friends. There were supposed to be five in all, but three bailed due to reasons outside of their control. E was a girl version of the Dread Pirate Roberts. Mr. M was a scotsman -- well, he had a kilt leftover from the annual Columbus fetish ball he attended the night before. Ms. V was my british ho'. Ah, what fun.

Well, we did have our problems scoring libations at the fest because 1) we were virtually broke, especially after a kamakaze shot and 2) Mr. M is a mere 20 years old and thus was not allowed into any drinking establishment. Yes, we did have "a nip" before we left, but we decided to go back to our place for another. Well, we did and it was then that I spontaneously switched costumes with the help of the half-Mexican Ms. V. We were joking around with the hairnet that came with my afro wig. Earlier that day, I modeled it for E while toying with hispanic stereotypes.

I did the same for M and V. V decided my appearance was just too good, and so with the help of black eyeliner, supplied me with the necessary tears, knuckle-writing, and Sacred Heart "hay-soos" tats. I only allowed it because, hey, we were in Athens, OH and chances are, no eses were going to mess with me. If we were in Columbus, I'd've been shot before I got two steps out the door. I completed the ensemble by buttoning the top button on my fly 70s shirt, and busting a major sag.

Man, I wish I had pictures.

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MY WEEKLY PERSONALITY ANALYSIS

Actually, this one is eerily accurate, given my role playing experience.

I Am A: Neutral Evil Human Thief Mage


Alignment:
Neutral Evil characters believe in Number One. Their personal gain takes precedance over all else, and they will work with whomever necessary and whatever institutions necessary to further their own goals.


Race:
Humans are the 'average' race. They have the shortest life spans, and because of this, they tend to avoid the racial prejudices that other races are known for. They are also very curious and tend to live 'for the moment'.


Primary Class:
Thieves are the most roguish of the classes. They are sneaky and nimble-fingered, and have skills with traps and locks. While not all use these skills for burglary, that is a common occupation of this class.


Secondary Class:
Mages harness the magical energies for their own use. Spells, spell books, and long hours in the library are their loves. While often not physically strong, their mental talents can make up for this.


Deity:
Mask is the Neutral Evil god of rogues, thieves. He is also known as the Lord of Shadows. He appears as a lithe man, shadowed, wearing dark clothing. His followers believe in stealth and wariness. They wear black and gray clothing, and carry weapons and armor similar to that of a thief. They frequently wear masks to conceal their identity. Mask's symbol is a dark, checkered mask.


Find out What D&D Character Are You?, courtesy ofNeppyMan (e-mail)

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[INSERT THEME FROM HALLOWEEN HERE]

Provided it's not too late, my costume for the big Athens Halloween fest will be the "blaxploitation karate dude" aka "Supersoulfighter." You know the image, like that dude who played Williams in Enter the Dragon. Karate outfit, mad skills and a huge-@$$ afro!

Current Music: Supersoulfighter by Lenny Kravitz

Soul brother space man
Flying through the sky
Fighting wars and battles
Protecting you and I

Right on!

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CD REVIEW

As I said, I splurged and got the subtlety&passion CD.

If you want to hear how (arguably) one of the best songwriters in America operates, get Robert Lamm's last solo CD In My Head -- it was lyrically exciting, if musically a bit dull, full of synths and drum tracks. Nice trip-hoppy rhythms at times, though.

This CD is just the opposite. Musically, it's really organic sounding. Don't let the CD fool you, though. Yes, it's full of the "Chicago horn sound," but I'm not sure exactly if and where all three of those horn players play together. There are actually five horn players throughout the album, and the only one who plays on all the tracks is trumpet player Lee Loughnane.

While it all makes for a very musically tasty album that sounds like Chicago from the early 70s, don't expect anything with the same lyrical depth.

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WHAT THE HECK

Since I have at least a temporary job with a few hours a week set up for me down in A-town, I decided to splurge anyway. Hey, it's been a war hell-ride of a week. Sure, I can say there's about as many good things as bad thing going on right now, but I decided to even them out a little.

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SO MUCH FOR SPLURGING

or, "bouncy bouncy bouncy"

Looks like I got hit with another NSF cascade. Life sucks.

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PLANNED SPLURGING

I don't know whether or not I've previously discussed Robert Lamm's new CD subtlety&passion. This CD's been in existence for a couple of months, but only through his website. Well, despite almost total destitution, I'm planning to get this CD before the end of the week, since I just found out that it's now available through retail.

There are some kick @$$ soundclips, too. Now, I've ranted many times about what great music Chicago (the band) can still produce when they get off their lazy musical @$$es. This CD is further testament to that, especially since it has every member of the band except for (my favorite -- sorry, Robert) Bill Champlin. Even two of Chicago's old guitarists are featured -- Chris Pinnick (their guitarist in the early 80s) and sound clips from Terry Kath!

The horn charts are something else. The whole album sounds like it could've come right after Chicago VII! That settles it, I'm buying it! It's just too damn good!

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GHETTO SUPERSTAR, PART... I DUNNO, pi, MAYBE

Ok, well, my last day in Columbus was ending really well. I said goodbyes to a few more people, one of which was this young kid (20) who, despite his deliberate actions indicating a low level of maturity, really said a mature, heartfelt goodbye.

Well, my stuff was packed and I was on the "rookie road," in crappy weather when my car shuddered and shook. I pulled off on the road -- I thought I was pure toast. There I was outside of the little hick town of Nelsonville on a dark, two lane highway with three minutes of talk time on my cell left (because I was roaming -- damn Verizon). I tried to move the car, but it wouldn't... then it would... then it wouldn't again. Each time, I'd go a little further and further, but it sounded almost like I was dragging something. I pulled off and checked under my car, but couldn't see anything. Then, I decided to just go for it. Apart from eerie engine noises, my car finished it's journey to E's (now, E's and my) pad. I moved the car once I regained my senses, and found that the transmission seemed very very wierd.

Damn tranny. Something like that's usually way too expensive to fix and I have no money at all right now.

I had to move my car again this morning, and things seemed normal. But, hell if I'm going to drive it very far unless and until I get it fixed. Damn. I have one more day of work at my old job in Columbus. Well, E told me I could borrow her car for the day. Still, though. It's a bitch, to say the least.

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METROEROTICISM

Check out a Talk of the Nation interview with Michael Flocker, author of The Metrosexual Guide to Style: A Handbook for the Modern Man on NPR.

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GETTIN' TO STEPPIN'

Well, I'm spending my last few moments in my previous residence, graciously provided by a friend of mine from church who will always have my eternal gratitude. The last traces of me are almost gone from the abode and packed into my vehicle.

I'm headed into totally unexplored territory for me. I've never lived with a significant other before. Stayed for extended periods of time, sure. But this time, I've no retreat, no getaway. It's mildly scary, but immensely exciting!

It's going to be a rough start, but if our (mine and E's) short relationship has been any indication whatsoever, I think it'll work out just fine.

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MOVIN' ON DOWN TO THE SOUTH SIDE

Well, the move is about 90% complete aside from a few pieces of baggage, both real and emotional, back up in Columbus. Man, I am exhausted.

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FIRST DAN OR BUST

Well, at this point, it looks like it's all in danger of being bust.

Due to various life circumstances, I believe the time has come for me to pick up and move down to my precious E in Athens, OH -- an hour and a half away from regular TKD/Kung Fu lessons and a smidge over two hours away from Mrs. R's classes.

I guess it doesn't have to be totally kaput, though. I mean, it's not really all that far away. I should be able to manage a trip at least a couple of times a month, shouldn't I? I sure hope so. I hate the idea of stopping after just being awarded first gup.

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NIGHT ON IDIOT MOUNTAIN ADDENDUM

E emailed me a correction about my telling of the Night on Idiot Mountain story...

Oh, but I do have one correction about the night on Idiot Mountain story -- I DID turn around when the white car came down to the parking lot area, what I DIDN'T do was shine my brights at them (in fact I'd turned off my brights just out of reflex for courtesy's sake). I'd already started to drive away
(which was my intention by turning around in the first place) when the guy came up to us. It was only at that point that I questioned if they maybe needed help. If I'd been in the car alone I NEVER would have stopped. Anyway, I've always been told that I am too trusting, when I am just trusting my instincts. My instincts weren't screaming danger at that point, just a general creepines, inappropriateness and stupidity (of them, not us).

Heh... courtesy. Well, that's what makes her such a special person. Me, my courteous streak is long gone when you're tailing me in the dead of night. They were just lucky I was sober ;).

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MY WEEKLY PERSONALITY ANALYSIS

"You Shook Me All Night Long" (by AC/DC)
'Cause the walls start shaking
The earth was quaking
My mind was aching
And we were making it and you -
Shook me all night long.


Which 80's Song Fits You?
brought to you by Quizilla

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NIGHT ON IDIOT MOUNTAIN

E and I were both having crappy days, so I figured WTH, and drove to see her last night. We had it in mind to take a romantic drive around the outskirts of Athens. We're making our way down this winding road when we see this car behind us, and pull off to allow it to pass. We go back down the road and find it a little ways later waiting for us! E and I pull off again a little ways down, this time going down a little road into a parking area. The car follows us in.

I was trying to get E to turn the car around and put them under the lights, but she wouldn't, thinking they might need help or that they were just goofing off. They were obviously OU students. One dude got out of the back seat. There were two in the front and one other blond girl in the back. We pull up to the exit, and the dude starts to approach the window. I tell Elena to take off, since we now weren't in the best tactical position. She did admit she was creeped out at the prospect that these are people tailing us in the dead of night. But, not creeped out enough, I guess to turn the tables and screw with them, like I would have ;).

Ok, I admit it. Part of me was a bit paranoid. If you needed something important, you wouldn't be tailing us in the dead of night. Had I been driving, I'd've had my brights right on them as they approached the car. Maybe intimated that I had a projectile weapon of some sort, and at the very least been ready to break my foot off in someone's @$$ if they would try anything.

Granted, they could've had the same plan. I guess we'll never know.

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INSIDE JOKE OF THE DAY

[In a robotic voice]
You will respect mah authoritah.

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FIRST DAN OR BUST

Yesterday, I made the 22 mile hike up to one of Mrs. R's classes. Maybe I'll get to one of T's classes this Saturday. Before class, I hurt my neck somehow. It was better by class time, but I knew Mrs. R would have some suggestions as to how to handle it, and she did, so I actually managed to get in a bit of a workout.

I got to learn part of the first of my two forms that I have to learn for this gup, the longer one. I was hoping to start on the shorter one, and perhaps get it all in one class. But, as it was, there were two first gups in class that day, myself and this little kid who wanted to learn the long one, so rather than have Mrs. R teach us separate, I thought I'd just learn the long one. No complaints, though.

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I THINK IT WAS THE GREAT PHILOSOPHER MR. T WHO SAID

I'll kill any man who try to take away what I got!

Wasn't that from Rocky III? In any case, this dude took those words to heart. Actually, he took them to someone else's heart.

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ONCE UPON A TIME IN COLUMBUS

I have to think up a better name for these posts. Anywho, for those curious as to how my belt test went, I copied and pasted a snippet of the entry I left on the forums of Rice Bowl Journals (click to vote on my blog, if you'd like). As I said... rough weekend, rough day. But here it is:

It wasn't my finest test, however. But, it's sort of like that old joke

"What do you call the person who graduated dead last in his med school class?"

"Doctor."

The part I feared most, the unusual move of having me defend against unchoreographed attacks (unusual for a 2nd gup exam, anyway) wasn't all that bad. I even managed a successful "gun against the temple" defense.

Since they did that to me, they allowed me to choose my breaks. I chose a wheel kick break (which I've never done before) and a backward knife hand groin strike, which is a break I had failed to do during my last "TKD/kung-fu all in the same night test." I think the fact that I chose that break sort of impressed them. I didn't do it to impress them, however -- it was just one of those things that's haunted me for awhile. Unfortunately, since I hadn't broken anything about almost a year, it took me two tries. Actually, it seemed like a bad night for breaking overall for all the testees.

Next step: First Dan or Bust. Hey... maybe that should be the new title? Hey, how 'bout that for a brainstorm:
FIRST DAN OR BUST for my TKD tales.
ONCE UPON A TIME IN COLUMBUS for my Kung Fu stories.

Night night, all.

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MY WEEKLY PERSONALITY ANALYSIS

It's two days late. But, it's been a rough weekend. I just got back from a crappy day at work at the end of an iffy weekend. But, here it is...

Are you Addicted to the Internet? 53% Average@Internet-User.com (41% - 60%) You seem to have a healthy balance in your life when it comes to the internet and life away from the computer. You know enough to do what you want online without looking like an idiot (most of the time). You even have your own Yahoo club or online journal! But you enjoy seeing your friends and going out to enjoy life away from your computer. The Are you Addicted to the Internet? Quiz at Stvlive.com!

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ONCE UPON A TIME IN COLUMBUS

Yesterday, I went in for a last training session before my 1st gup exam tomorrow evening. I spent the majority of the class working on my creative self-defense, particularly, my grappling defenses, i.e. defenses that end in a submission hold and/or joint lock.

I've mentioned before that traditionally, the club's requirement to pass my current grade is the formulation of 6 self-defenses, 2 involving weapons, 2 involving multiple attackers, and 2 involving grappling. Typically, this involves conceptualizing certain scenarios and arranging your techniques accordingly.

Now, the head instructors of the club have seen fit with my gradings to alter the requirements. This has to do with the fact that I remain the first person in their school to double-promote three consecutive times (10th to 8th gup, 8th to 6th, 6th to 4th) -- they've tweaked my exams to make things more, shall we say, interesting. In my last exam, I tested for my new Tae Kwon Do andKung Fu ranks at the same time.

This time around, rather than be allowed to work out defense scenarios, I was told my rank test would include what we call "any attack, any defense," which in class is precisely what it says. I won't know what's coming, if weapons will be used, or how many will attack me. I'm subject to the same two ground rules - each opponent must be "finished," and disarmed with me possessing the weapon(s).

So, yesterday as I had various classmates throw all manner of attacks at me, two things became clear which may have positive or negative implications, depending on how you look at it.

First, I seem to instinctively have a preference for evasion over closing the distance and getting the job done. While this may be preferable, it assumes I'll always have enough space to do this in a real life scenario. Plus, it makes me vulnerable to an attacker with a weapon to simply throwing the weapon.

Second, at close ranges, I typically execute quick strikes and takedowns, relying on strikes to vital organs. While the majority of the techniques I use may be effective (My scrappin' days were long over by the time I started martial arts), I've never effectively learned to use techniques in the clinch in a "close-to-real-life" scenario. In "any attack, any defense" scenarios, I simply didn't let people get that close. And, when they did (a hold from behind, for instance) I pretty much focused on shielding myself and waiting for an opportunity to get a strike in somewhere, when perhaps some grappling would've been the answer.

To that end, after class, I camped out at a Barnes and Noble for awhile and sat with the Gracies' (Royce and Charles?) book on Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu and self-defense. Now, I know what you're thinking. "No way you're gonna pick up anything you're gonna remember come test time." But, all of the grappling techniques I've practiced thus far (in a controlled and structured manner) have been BJJ moves, and most of the ones I noted in the book involve escape moves before the clinch is put on. Plus, they simply build on moves or principles I'm already familiar with.

Hehe... I hope someone tries to half-nelson me ;).

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UNEARTHED TREASURES

The screenplay to my favorite movie of all-time!

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BAD NPR TRIP

Last week, I heard something on the show Fresh Air on the way to Tae Kwon Do class, an interview with Bill O'Reilly.

I've typically been indifferent to Mr. O'Reilly, occassionally tuning in to "The Factor" sort of the same way I'd watch various train wrecks. Sounds bad, I know, but sometimes, I watch these shows not knowing or caring what the people on the show believe -- I like the screaming matches between people using a higher level of vocabulary than what's found on, say, Springer.

On the other hand, I've liked NPR for years. The show Fresh Air has been literally that, at times. Terry Gross is a great interviewer for her style -- calm, poised, direct but not pushy.

O'Reilly didn't like his interview. In fact, he cut it short, then apparently went on his show the next day venting the usual right-wing paranoia about the "liberal media out to get me" and such.

I listened to the interview, and yes, he did stomp out of the end of it like a spoiled child. But, at that point, I don't know if I blame him. Terry Gross seemed unusually tense the whole interview, even before Bill O'Reilly got ornery, which really wasn't, in my estimation, until about 2/3 of the way into it. It was like Terry "locked and loaded" before the interview, much like Isaac Hayes did in that one scene in I'm Gonna Git You, Sucka, stuffing guns in every pocket.

Seemed like the interviewer ended up the way Isaac did when he tripped and fell and all the guns went off. Luckily, like Isaac, the bullets seemed to miss all her vital organs :).

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TODAY IN MISCELLANEA

The previous entry was cobbled together with Windows Notepad over the course of a horrendous day of computer-related mishaps during which I trapsed through half of the city of Columbus trying to find a high-speed internet connection. The one at home seemed temporarily out of service, all the brances of the Columbus Public Library were closed due to the holiday, and most of the connections at various free Wi-Fi hotspots I know were dubious at best today.

In short, today sucked.

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METROEROTICISM

I've been meaning to treat this topic for some time now, since I took my last "Weekly Personality Analysis."

I was introduced to the term "metrosexual" some time ago, way back near the start of my blogging experience on Word Spy. The term caught my eye, and the definition seemed interesting, but I was distracted by other things at the time. I didn't know or read enough about it to think about any personal implications.

Then some time recently I ran across the now-famous (for those tracking this subject) article by Stacey Pressman Nothing Sexy About Metrosexuals. Her descriptions as to what a metrosexual was and why she didn't find them sexy seemed to hit a little too close to home.

I took a quiz similar to the one she referenced in her article on Rooshlog. This was before I took the one on Quizilla. The results were as follows:

The Metrosexual Quiz Results
Your Score: 22 / 50

YOUR SCORE
44.0% 22.0 points out of 50

AVG SCORE
32.0% 16.0 points out of 50

3497 have taken this test so far.

783 people have scored higher than you.

2641 people have scored lower than you.

73 people made the same grade as you.

What does this mean? *
22 points is in the 21 through 34 points range
You're a metrosexual. The next girl you hook up with will be more masculine than you, full mustache and all. Is it time to buy new tweezers?

Interesting, huh?

My sister and closer friends of mine could testify to my random musing over the past year or so about certain predilictions of mine: expensive hair product, a streamlined wardrobe, and styles, mannerisms, and cultural knowledge that sort of makes me resemble an "after" photo of any random Straight Guy after a Queer Eye make-over (and, all this before the show existed, mind you).

There was a few moments when it sort of forced me to consider the question, "Could I be a homosexual? Bi, even?" Despite a perceived preponderance of evidence, one crucial fact remains -- I have yet to be physically or emotionally attracted to any male to a degree remotely in the same ball park as my attractions to females.

So, given all of that, I've decided to add yet another semi-regular category to discuss these matters as they pertain to my life -- Metroeroticism.

Next Entry: Do I decide to continue using Paul Mitchell's Tea Tree styling wax or fall back on my tried and true Tigi Bed Head wax?

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"JUST INSULTING," PART DEUX

Haha... a few entries back, I made fun of NBC's Coupling for copying an episode lock, stock, and barrel from the BBC's Coupling. Well, thanks to BBC America, I can watch the original episode yet again. In fact, I'm doing so right now!

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MY WEEKLY PERSONALITY ANALYSIS

How could I have forgotten?


You are a Metrosexual. No you are not gay but you
are sometimes what people would consider a
girly man. But you are just in touch with your
feminine side. You're the next "in thing
to be". Or you are just a really butch
girl.


Are you Metrosexual? (With Pictures)
brought to you by Quizilla

Fine, I'm outed now -- happy? ;)

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BABY, WHAT A BIG SURPRISE

You've seen this entry before.

Just came back from seeing E yadda yadda yadda. Had a great time doing x, y and z. Sad now, having to come back. Maybe I should blah blah blah.

Seriously, though, this is the first trip I made down there in *gasp* two whole weeks. I had completely forgotten how draining it can be to be away from your dearest. It's really no different from the drain to carve out the time to spend in an LD relationship.

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ONCE UPON A TIME IN COLUMBUS

Well, yesterday I made the 30 mile trip to one of Mrs. R's classes. I got to re-learn all of the TKD one steps I had forgotten. And, I learned that my board-breaking "won't be one of those crazy breaks you did for kung fu." Just a simple two-direction break where they've graciously allowed me to choose my tehniques. It's usually "instructors' choice," you see.

As usual, though, I'm in more pain after one of these classes than I am after a class at the "main branch" of the club.

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NOW IT'S JUST INSULTING

For kicks and giggles, I looked at the website for NBC's version of the show Coupling. Looking at the next episode, they're just copying lock, stock, and barrel one of the episodes from the BBC series.

Did I say, "insulting?" More like "pathetic."

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PLAYING THE RACE CARD

or, I'll Never Again Ask Myself, Who do I have to look up to? After Seeing a Bio on George Washington Carver.

October, I just discovered, is Filipino-American History Month.

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GHETTO SUPERSTAR, PART DEUX

It's bad enough having electrcal tape covering up part of the power cord. Even worse that for some reason, I need a 1/4 inch lift under the right bottom corner of my laptop just so that the hard drive won't freeze. But last night, out of nowhere, the laptop hinge finally gave in, so right now, the screen's supported by my planner.

And, I just got a wireless card for it, too. I know, I know, it was sort of like putting a spoiler on my ghetto-@$$ car. But still.

I feel like rhymin'

my name iz...
Shake-zula
the mic rulah
the old schoolah
you wanna trip,
I'll bring it to ya

Frylock and I'm on top
rock you like a cop
Meatwad you're up next
with your knock-knock

Meatwad make the money see
Meatwad get the honeys G
Drivin in my car,
livin' like a star
Ice on my fingers and my toes
and I'm a Taurus

ha ha, check it, uh, check-check it, yeah


'cuz we are tha Aqua Teenz
make the homeys say ho
'n the girlies wanna scream
'cuz we are tha Aqua Teenz
make the homeys say ho
'n the girlies wanna scream
yeah
Aqua Teen Hunger Force
numba one in tha hood, G

Aqua Teen Hunger Force Rap
by Schoolly D

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BIG HAIR DAY

Here's a test all of you need to take!

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BIORHYTHMICALLY CHALLENGED

My biorhythms must be at an all-time low.

-Doctor Who, The Pirate Planet

Somehow, I just need to finally accept that I cycle between normalcy and depression. I've suspected this for awhile.

See, this season of my life has far more going for it than it did not too long ago. I still have a lot of the things that have made me happy. A lot of the possibilities I embraced are still there.

Yet, right now, I feel as bad as I ever did. Unaccomplished. Tired. Avoidant. Depressed.

These are the times when my life has slipped by me. Not necessarily because any huge disaster has happened (although, that has been the case on a few occassions), but because any minor problem or setback or task that can't be immediately solved or completed with my usual devil-may-care, ace problem-solving ability can send me spiraling down if it just happens to catch me at the wrong time.

Well, not this time. This time, I'm going to accept that this is how I feel. And, I'm going to muddle through it, ticking off the tasks I need to perform and the problems I need to take care of, just like I would if I was feeling like a devil-may-care ace problem-solver.

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QUESTIONS... 65 & 66...?

Am I running a blog or a web journal?

Seems like the latter, according to this, although eventually, the question may end up to be along the lines of Does Anybody Really Know What Time It Is?.

Does anybody really know what time it is?
Does anybody really care?
If so, I can't imagine why.
We've all got time enough to cry.

by Robert Lamm
performed by Chicago

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HODGE PODGE

Well, I got a couple of things accomplished today (actually yesterday -- it is 1:40 AM), not the least of which was convincing my car insurance company to allow me to push my payment date this month back a couple of weeks. Progressive rocks!

I practiced some TKD/Kung fu tonight all by my lonesome, trying to go through everything I remember and musing over where all the holes in my knowledge are. I got three TKD belt levels of one-steps to recall, almost all of my kung fu one-steps, kicking techniques and staff form.

And, speaking of martial arts, I came across a reference to an upcoming episode of a PBS show entitled Independent Lens. The episode itself is called Shaolin Ulysses which focuses on the story of 5 Shaolin monks trying to spread their art and teachings to America. Check your local listings!

I should be in bed right now, but for some reason the PC Card adapter wouldn't work. I decided to try one last reboot and took out the 6' cable that I had patched between my computer and the main 30' cable extending from the router. Serves me right for going out too much lately just to be able to mooch WiFi as opposed to good ol' fashioned ethernet.

I talked to E a couple of times today, once on IM and then later on the phone. The IM conversation wasn't pretty. I was melting down as it was because of all the random things I had yet to deal with that day, and the meltdown just continued as our conversation went on. I called her later on to apologize, and she was so completely understanding and loving.

I'm the luckiest guy in the world.

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WANTED: ONE MOTIVATIONAL SPEAKER

Because I sure don't have any motivation right now.

I had a long weekend of work and general funnery. But, it was tiring. I slept for about 9 hours last night. I got up an hour ago and still feel almost totally discombobulated.

I got three things to do on my "to do" list for today, and the whole day off. I suppose I should at least shower and shave now, huh?

OTHER MISCELANEA
I did go ahead and crop/grayscale a headshot of me for Rice Bowl Journals. Eh, why not?

On Saturday, E scored a new computer -- a CPU, that is. The future roomie scored it from a neighbor's eviction and was willing to give it to her.

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TODAY IN MISCELLANEA

ITEM ONE
E was here last night. We went to Gallery Hop with some friends, and even though it was sort of late, we actually saw a gallery or two. She left early this afternoon -- that's the part that always sucked.

ITEM TWO
Lots to do over the next couple of days. Will I get it done? I'll let you all know.

ITEM THREE
I've been notified that I'm now an official member of Rice Bowl Journals.

ITEM FOUR
In order to fulfill their requirement of a small black and white digital photo, I dug up an image (a close facsimile) and used a nice freeware image editor known as IrfranView. It's definitely worth every penny I could potentially pay for it!

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GHETTO SUPERSTAR

I need a new muffler, as it sort of just fell off of my car yesterday. (Did I forget to mention that? The trauma must've caused my mind to temporarily blank it out.) Yeah, now I got what was once known back in the day as a "hooptie."

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ONE LAST THING

Since my numerous entries today have so skewed the page and since the TV show 7 Days is on right now, I've reverted the blog back to showing 7 days' worth of postings.

Now, I'm going to bed... seriously. Well, maybe in a bit.

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MY WEEKLY PERSONALITY ANALYSIS

It is Friday, given this late hour. So...


You're Mr. Orange!


Which Reservoir Dog Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Current Music: Little Green Bag by George Baker

That's it. I'm going to bed.

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IDIOT BOXING

Ahhh... a showing of the BBC's Coupling. I feel that my mind is being cleansed after watching (shudder) the American version.

While I'm on the topic of the idiot box, what is the deal with these Direct TV commercials featuring dramatic readings of customer letters by top actors? So far, I've seen Danny DeVito, Laurence Fishburne, John Goodman and Andy Garcia.

There used to be a day that when a movie actor did commercials, said person's career was usually understood to be on its last legs. I saw some camera commericial awhile back with Val Kilmer. It was a sad commercial, and what was the last good thing he was in since The Doors?

You got a big-shot producer. You got one of the stars of The Matrix. Ok, John-boy did King Ralph, but c'mon -- you all know he's good. And, you got the last person to assume the mantle of The Godfather. These ain't slouches, yet there they are, on TV doing Direct TV commercials.

I'm boggled.

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PLAYING THE RACE CARD

As if numerous entries concerning the martial arts weren't enough.

I stumbled across Rice Bowl Journals, which bills itself as "an Asian online journal community." It's a directory of blogs written by people of Asian descent. I'm considering submitting this here site.

Why? My sole response to that question truly is, "Why not?"

That's it. No treatise on "getting in touch with my Asian roots." I haven't "come out of the Asian closet" after having been in denial, living in the U.S. of A all my life.

It's a cool site about blogs of Asian people.

I got a blog.

I'm Asian.

All's I need is a black and white photo of myself (or a reasonable facsimile). Actually, I just might go with the facsimile. No need to scare people, and all.

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ONCE UPON A TIME IN COLUMBUS

[Ed. note: I gotta think up a new title]

So, apparently I'm not the only returning student to my school. A third dan who apparently hasn't been seen for a few months returned to TKD class tonight. And, not only that, another black belt who attends rather intermittently ran most of the class tonight. It was quite the workout.

But, the best part was afterward. When these folks decided to have an impromptu kung fu class, I just had to stay behind. I managed to relearn most of my green sash requirements. But, the best part was when we worked on impromptu self-defense techniques.

The concept is simple. One person is the defender. An attacker or attackers get to attack any way they want -- armed, unarmed, from any side, one at a time, or all at once. My turn came, and I was stabbed at with a (fake) knife. So, I parried and trapped the knife arm while hooking the attacker's neck, whereupon I kneed him (lightly) in the throat.

The onlookers gaped a bit, much like in that scene in The Magnificent Seven where that dude shoots a man off his horse at like 200 yards. An onlooker gaped, while the dude said, "I was aiming for the horse."

Truth was, I was trying for a kick to his head. I was too close and his throat connected with my knee... heh.

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INSIDE JOKE OF THE DAY

One lil' tidbit I may have forgot to tell you about my sojourn to the border of Orgyville -- [details omitted]

-Me in an email to E

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LIFE IN MOTION

everybody's gotta take a turn
to realize we got a lot to learn
what are dreams and what is real
you gotta trust what you feel
and the five town man can prove
with no bucks and nothing to lose
don't need a lot that money can't buy
i have so much i'm in motion

Life In Motion
by Robert Lamm

I went and looked at a new apartment today - a nice two bedroom to be shared with a decent roommate. Hopefully, my credit troubles won't get too too much in the way. The only two problems are that it's clear on the other side of town from where I am now and that makes finding a new job even more imperative than it was before. The other is that I'm really hoping I can front the cash and resources to move in.

Hopefully, things will all work out. Things have, though, as my life goes into motion again. I did splurge a little bit, though, since I found out that the application fees and rent weren't going to cost quite as much as I thought -- I went out and got me a cheap generic Wi-Fi card. That way, I don't have to depend on going to random coffee shops or other Wi-Fi spots and needing their free gear (if any) to be available. Plus, I've got more than one friend willing to let me mooch off of their wireless setups. Lugging a cable around is such a pain in the @$$. Not that I'll be able to afford cable or wireless at my new place. But, who knows.

E comes up this weekend for Gallery Hop. She invited a friend of hers to come, and though she doesn't know it yet, I invited the future roomie to come, too. I better call and tell her, huh? Not that anyone will mind, I'm (99%) sure.

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ONCE UPON A TIME IN COLUMBUS

After another war hell ride of a class -- I am in pain, all over -- I got some news...

THREE WEEKS!

That's how long I've been given to polish up my techniques, remember anything and everything I've forgotten in the past 10 or so months of being away from training, and get myself into shape before testing for 1st gup (i.e. black belt candidate).

Now, if I remember correctly, the testing requirements for my school include 2 forms (which I know), breaking and I think two creative self defense techniques.

The breaking prospect alone might concern me. Before I stopped training, Mrs. R "threatened" that my breaking technique would be something crazier than for my last rank test. My last break consisted of three simultaneous breaks using a kung fu technique. I only managed 2 out of 3 in my initial try. What she proposed for my next test was a high wheel kick immediately followed by what's called a "sho tan" -- sort of a drop/spin kick thing that you see in movies all the time to knock someone off their feet. If you saw it, you'd know what I'm talking about. Actually, that move isn't meant to knock people off their feet. It's meant to smash their ankles and cripple them. Man, I love me some serious kung fu. ANYway, the sho tan break involves a free-standing board, so I'd need to execute my technique perfectly in order to break it, as opposed to sending it off flying into the onlookers.

I don't know if she'll have me do that after all the time I've been away. But with her and her husband, you never know. It's great with teachers such as those who really are in tune with what someone is capable of and will try their hardest to bring it out of someone. So far, I've never regretted attempting anything that they thought I could do, even if I thought I couldn't -- even if I didn't succeed initially.

In any case, the prospect of the break doesn't scare me as much as what Mrs. R proposed for my creative self-defense. I had several bits of ideas when I stopped, but never developed them. Mrs. R told me that rather than create defenses, she would subject me to random attacks. She feels my self-defense techniques are my strong suit. Where did she get that? I feel like I can get cold-cocked just like anyone else. I don't fear getting beat up by strangers. I'm usually paranoid enough to be ready in strange situations. No, I fear just getting jacked by someone I wouldn't be suspicious of for whatever reason. Anyway, that's what I gotta look forward to in three weeks.

I should just be grateful that she isn't making me test for red sash in kung fu! I'm sure she would if she thought she could :).

It is exciting, though, to know that by March or April of 2004, I could be a 1st dan (black belt). I'm really looking forward to the time when I get my kung fu black sash, though.

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CRUEL WORLD

Yesterday, I was in that unfortunate position of being hungry and broke. I wasn't totally without means -- I had a bit of money that I just didn't want to touch, but I gave in. Now, this wouldn't have been an issue if I had time to go home, but I didn't. Anyway, I caved and stopped at the nearest Chipotle. Why not -- if you're going to blow money on food, might as well eat well, right?

There was an instance awhile back when I'd get to the register, and if for whatever reason it's non-functional, they'll simply give you your food. Well, yesterday, I thought it was going to happen. The register was down and the guy in front of me got a "don't worry about it." Wouldn't you know that in the millisecond it took for me to assume his spot when he left, they fixed the damn register and had me pay?

Well, what could I do? I payed and enjoyed a nice lunch. So, I get back to work and a coworker was giving away his lunch because apparently, he wanted to go out for lunch as well. So, I had me an additional half of a chicken-salad sandwich and a brownie.

It was just as well I ate as much as I did, because I didn't have much time for dinner before my kung fu class -- which I had to basically teach again, btw. Well, tutor, really -- I hate calling myself a teacher when I don't have a black sash.

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TEMPLATE UPDATE

Well, since a few people have graciously decided to allow me to link to their personal pages, I've done so.

I also added the link to BBC's Coupling. Not that tripe that I couldn't even finish watching last night.

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OFTEN IMITATED, NEVER DUPLICATED

When, oh, when are we going to learn that we Americans haven't successfully copped a British TV show since Sanford and Son? Late last night, I caught a few minutes of NBC version of the BBC comedy Coupling. Can we say, "horrible"? They tried so hard, too. But it just isn't the same. Picture the horror of British phrasing being used by Americans. It'd be better if they at least tried to fake the accents. NBC put Queer Eye right from Bravo -- why not do the same with Coupling rather than do such a crappy remake? The sets even look mostly the same, for pete's sake. Big corporation like NBC could roll over PBS in a second, couldn't they? Not that I'd ever advocate that. But, I just hate seeing a great show f**ked up like that.

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ONCE UPON A TIME IN COLUMBUS

Looks like I'll finally have time tonight to get to a kung fu class! Woohoo! But, I gotta get back up to Mr. or Mrs. R (my old masters) ASAP. Y'know, I think I'm going to practice a bit right now.

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LYRIC OF THE DAY

There's been so many things thats held us down.
But now it looks like things are finally comin' around.
I know we've got, a long long way to go,
and where we'll end up, I don't know.
But we won't let nothin' hold us back,
we're putting our selves together,
we're polishing up our act!
If you felt we've been held down before,
I know you'll refuse to be held down anymore!

Ain't No Stoppin' Us Now
- MacFadden and Whitehead

And, it's about freakin' time for me, too!

I've been slowly ticking things off of my "To Do" list today, but I'm not feeling like I truly accomplished anything. I know that simply isn't true. I've taken a few more steps today toward my desired goals, and there are more I'll need to take tomorrow.

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TODAY IN MISCELLANEA

ITEM ONE
It sort of ticked me off having a week's worth of blog posts and scrolling all the way down the page to see that long blank grey border running down the left side with nothing in it. So, I chopped the number of days' posts you see at one time to three.

Besides, it'll make that "archives" link a bit more useful. Not like y'all read previous posts, anyway ;). Heck, I wonder how many care about my current stuff heh.

ITEM TWO
Lots of stuff to do this week. I'm planning a move with another roommate, as well as the accomplishment of all my other goals by the end of this month. I'm a stressbag, wondering how it's all going to play out. I wonder if this is how E felt as she returned from Korea.

ITEM THREE
This weekend has been a minor bump in the relationship road. On top of not anticipating not seeing each other this week due to lack of time, E and I have both been busy and/or tired to spend more than a few moments on the phone at a time. Part of the problem is that I've always had a problem redirecting my energy. It's like inertia -- once I get on a roll, doing something or being focused on something, it's hard for me to switch tracks. Take my Sunday. It was a long-@$$ day, between church, working, and finding snippets of time to think about all the things I needed to accomplish this week and when. When I got back home, I wanted to chill (read: watch some TV while I sit and wonder what the heck else I needed to be doing), even though I promised E a call. So, we talk, but I wasn't in the mood nor did I have the energy. I felt like total crap, because I know that I've gotten this way in previous relationships. I tend to compartmentalize the different aspects of my life, and that's not really good, especially knowing that I need to "gear up and down" as I float back and forth between those aspects.

That sounds like a part of me that I have to work out some more.

ITEM FOUR
I'm addicted to Tech TV, especially the show Call For Help. I'm digging Robot Wars, too, not because I care about the "fighting robot" genre, but the fact that the MC is Craig Charles aka Lister on Red Dwarf.

ITEM FIVE
I was seriously jonesing for some salad for lunch today, so I went out and got some, but forgot to get dressing. I thought I'd have to mooch off of my housemate, but as I raided the fridge, I found an old (but still within the expiration date) bottle of caesar-with-bacon dressing I bought awhile back!

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THE CHARGE: AIDING AND ABETTING

Two days ago, I get this email.

Hello
We are putting together a reality based show for Vh1 about people who are obessed with different aspects of pop culture. I am interested in your biggest blaxploitation fantatics. Please call me so that I can explain the show in further detail.
Thanks

[Name omitted out of courtesy]
Associate Producer
Broadway Video
[212-XXX-XXXX]

This is probably in reference to my old webpage on my AOL site dedicated to the Shaft movies. If you look at this page, let me apologize in advance. I made it as a lark almost a decade ago, and it hasn't been updated since the John Singleton remake came out in 2000. Before then, it probably wasn't updated for 3 or 4 years. For pete's sake, it still uses HTML 2.0. Then again, most of my stuff does hehe.

I did a little web digging on my own and discovered a couple of references to people sending out similar emails or leaving messages on bulletin boards. I think it's all for a show I've heard about called VH1: Obsessed (or something like that) about fans totally obsessed about pop culture thingys, things like Shaft or Fraggle Rock, etc.

Oh, what the heck, I'll write her back. I'm sure as heck not going to blow a long-distance dime on it. Or, should I "Just say no!" and not contribute to the whole "Reality TV" blight?

Though I have to admit, there is something appealing about that whole "If you can't beat 'em, join 'em" line of thinking.

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MY WEEKLY PERSONALITY ANALYSIS

This week, you get two for the price of one.

I've taken a version of this before, but I think this test was a little more comprehensive.


You are the Seventh Doctor: Brooding, enigmatic,
soulful, and occasionally silly. There are a
great many mysteries lurking behind your
ancient eyes, and even your closest companions
aren't allowed to know the full extent of your
schemes and concerns. You are often downright
manipulative, using friends and adversaries
alike as chess pieces in a private game against
the universe. Your wrath is slow to build, but
terrible when aroused, and you are slowly
settling old scores with threats across the
cosmos.


Which Incarnation of the Doctor Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

I also took its "companion test" if you'll excuse the pun.


Looks as though you've got your heart set on the
second Romana, as played by Lalla Ward! This
tempting Time Lady conceals her inhuman
cleverness behind a disarmingly enthusiastic
and girlish demeanor. She's an eclectic blonde
who loves to travel and enjoy herself, and if
you gaze too long into those summer-sky eyes,
she'll have you wrapped around her finger. Not
that you'll mind.


Which Lovely Doctor Who Companion Are You Ashamed To Admit Your Crush On?
brought to you by Quizilla

Hey, I always did have a crush on this one. Leela had nothing on her, even in her skin tight leather scivvies.

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FOREVER ADDICTED TO LOVE

As if Johnny Cash wasn't bad enough. Robert Palmer, too?

Addicted to Love was one of the first 45 RPMs I ever bought. Sorry to all you young bucks who don't really know this artist, this song, or what a "45" is.

Current Music: Get It On (Bang a Gong) by Power Station

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ONCE UPON A TIME IN COLUMBUS

I forgot to mention that last Monday, I did attend the taekwondo class still taught by one of my old masters. Due to a wierd set of circumstances, I did see both of my masters for the first time in almost a year. It was great! I've added them to my list of "People I Will Never Lose Touch With Ever Again."

The class was, as Wesley Willis puts it, "a yell-down war hell ride." I had almost forgotten how far they push. Not that my friend who currently runs the main branch of the club does badly -- not at all! But, my old teachers have not lost their touch.

I got a bunch of questions answered about my "memory lapses" and I did get to help teach a bit. The whole class was made up of home-schooled children of various ages, but some were of higher rank than me. Regardless, I was asked to help the 1st and 2nd gups develop their creative self-defense requirements.

Despite the (few) dubious examples I've seen of the products of home-schooling, I have to say that the kids I worked with that day were great! They were polite, grateful, and most importantly, completely willing to absorb everything I had to offer, even the kids that outranked me.

I don't know if I can make it to that class every week. It's one heck of a drive out in the middle nowhere outside of northern Columbus. But, I've been asked to come back whenever I can, and in exchange: kung fu instruction!!

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THIS WEEK IN MISCELLANEA

ITEM ONE
Yes, I was there again. Yes, I had lots of fun. Yes, I'm down again.

ITEM TWO
Got a decent haircut today! Now, I don't feel like such a mop-head.

ITEM THREE
Same random financial difficulties as usual, though I'm not as abjectly impoverished. I've had enough to make the purchases I've had to make and a couple I didn't, such as...

ITEM FOUR
...Weekly planner pages for my Franklin Planner! Though they don't make weekly pages for the particular style I'm using, I decided 1) To dispense with picking a "style" altogether -- I can MacGyver bits and pieces of stuff, and after 4 years of using one, I pretty much know the ins and outs of it and 2) That to accomodate my particular brain style, going to a weekly system made the most sense -- It gives me a sense of "the bigger picture" as I work toward my goals. Just ticking off tasks and following my schedule "a day at a time" was do-able, but I finally figured out that I was losing touch with my week. Hm, maybe this was a "need" after all. Hopefully, this'll help because...

ITEM FIVE
...The past few months have been building to what I feel is one heck of a wave on which I can hopefully ride toward achieving my various life dreams. I've never felt so "on the verge" before. I'm feeling that this is my last chance. For better or worse (though, I would definitely say better), I've co-opted E's line of thinking of "Hey, I'm [censored] years old, etc. etc." Well, I'm 30, and too damn far behind.

And I'm tired of turning my back on myself
Throwing truth away
Let the fire burn down the front door to myself
And give me a season of play

The Show Must Go On
by Bill Champlin
perf. by Chicago

This is the song I keep coming back to again and again. I guess I've just got to keep on living it out.

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ONCE UPON A TIME IN COLUMBUS (cont.)

Just got off the phone with my old "master," though both he and his wife hate to be called that since there is only one Master. Anyway, class is in an hour and a half, and I expect to get beat down! This is a good thing.

Ed. Note: In case you haven't figured it out yet (or did I post this once?), entries under this title detail my forays back into the study of martial arts -- just wanted to make sure we were all clear on this.

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ONCE UPON A TIME IN COLUMBUS

I was advised the other day to actually track down and visit the original instructors of my martial arts school and see if I can 1) reconnect, since they've found out I've rejoined class and have been asking about me and 2) get some pointers in a class that's taught Mondays and Wednesdays up where they live.

My friend, we'll call him T. is great, but he's got his hands full with the main school what with training the lower-ranked color belts. I ask questions on things I can't remember, and he can barely remember. But I will say this -- watching how his kicks have improved in power and speed, now I know how he got to black belt! We haven't gotten a chance to spar yet, but I'm almost certain he can outfight me, surprise kung-fu style kicks from me, notwithstanding.

Class is at 1:30. I'll call in a few and see what's up.

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I GOT THE FUNK

Unfortuneately, not the good kind.

I got hit hard yesterday. Saturday night, E came up just to get away from school, be in the comforting arms of yours truly, and to be in the company of friends. As anticipated (maybe I turned it into a self-fulfilling prophecy?), come Sunday morning when she left, I felt completely down.

I'm better now, though, after 9 hours of sleep, but only marginally.

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THE REAL O.G.

I got a sneak peak (i.e. listen) at Johnny Cash's last album American IV: The Man Comes Around. He did the most bad-@$$ cover of Personal Jesus by Depeche Mode.

Listen to it, and find out, if you don't already know, why he was so kick @$$.

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MY WEEKLY PERSONALITY ANALYSIS

I took the McDonalds test, and guess what I got?





You can take the
McDonalds Product Test by Matio64
here!

Ya want fries with that?

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CALL DEWEY, CHEATUM, & HOWE

This morning, E found out that her driver's side door had a sizeable dent. There was a card left stuck in her door by the honorable soul who smacked her car. It was E's neighbor across the street who happens to be a high-level mucky-muck at OU.

Hey, wouldn't that be some stuff if that'd be my ticket into grad school? Unfortunately, lacking the stones or the skills of a grifter, I'm not sure exactly how to make that work.

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THE ODDITIES OF CELLULAR TECHNOLOGY

Here I am again, broadcasting live and direct from the campus of lovely OU.

Joy of joys, I found out that despite information to the contrary, my cell phone is NOT roaming out of network while I'm in what some (not me) would call the "backwaters of Ohio." Even more odd are those features I can and can't access while away from greater metropolitan Columbus.

In downstate New York, I can neither directly access Verizon's *611 features, nor can I use dialing shortcuts to access voice mail. Here in Athens, I can't use *611, but I can access voicemail via dialing shortcuts. And, technically in Athens, I'm not supposed to make any call that isn't billed at $.99/minute. But hey, it's a small price to pay.

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MADNESS, I SAY... MAAAADNESS

I didn't get a chance to express my righteous indignation at hearing this the other day on the radio.

They want to tax coffee??? Listen to this crap...

NPR's Morning Edition

PRI's Marketplace

It's enough to make one want to mobilize an army and give the government a "yell-down war hell ride."

No no, I'm just kidding, Mr. or Ms. CIA/FBI/ATF/Homeland Security Cyber-Monitor. Quit spying on me. My parents were from the Catholic part of the Philippines, not the Muslim part.

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TODAY IN MISCELLANEA

ITEM ONE
On my way down to Athens, I heard an old song on the radio that I haven't on the airwaves in years, Couple Days Off by Huey Lewis & the News. I remember going to the concert they had in support of this album. This was the song right before the encore. I remember that every time Huey sang the first three lines of one of the choruses, for instance...

'Cos I am only human. I am no machine
I need a little lovin' darlin, you know what I mean
Don't misunderstand me, I'm not gettin' soft
All I want is a...

...his entire road crew filtered out from back stage and took their places just in time to all shout in unison...

COUPLE DAYS OFF!

Now that's freakin' showmanship, IMO! Just like when Huey would take his harmonica and pitch it back to one of his roadies who'd catch it with a ball mitt. Showmanship, man! No costume changes, no overcomplicated dance numbers with lip-synched music. Just the time, effort and imagination to just entertain a crowd. Talk about a lost art.

ITEM TWO
I'm here blogging again from the campus of OU. It amazes me how they do this. Here I am, Mr. John Doe, a friend of a student, sitting here in the library with my laptop plugged into their network and simply messing around. I could be anybody. I could be formulating and launching the next big internet virus from here (no, don't worry Mr. or Ms. CIA/FBI/ATF/Homeland Security Cyber-Monitor -- I'm not even of middle eastern decent. Why are you spying on me to begin with?), for all anyone knows. But here I sit, totally unchallenged. Amazing.

ITEM THREE
Yes, it's sooo good to be near E. again.

ITEM FOUR
Just for kicks, the "this way to the egress" link above now points to a temporary, experimental homepage. I'm currently debating whether or not to keep my AOHell account/site or not. Hell, geocities offers webspace for just the right price -- absosmurfly nothing!

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(EMOTIONAL) TANK'S ON E?

That's what I'm feeling right now. My life isn't bad, currently -- at least as many good things as bad are happening right now. But I'm feeling somewhat anxious and depressed right now. To be sure, I've got things to be anxious and depressed over, but nothing to make me feel like this. I just need a bit of regeneration, I think. To refuel my emotional tanks. I'm really glad I'm going to be with E for the next couple of days.

On the downside, I won't be getting my martial arts fix this week until at least Saturday.

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PLAYING THE RACE CARD

I've decided to step up looking for ways to re-enter graduate school to finish my degree. One thing I'm trying to do is to root out all that money that everyone says is set aside for minorities of various types. I'm at the local library right now.

I've never really been of one opinion or the other as far as the whole affirmative action debate, except to say to all those who are able to take advantage of it, "Hey... way to beat The Man!" I've always had a healthy respect for anyone who can beat the system. Here's hoping I can now count myself among them.

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LYRIC OF THE DAY

I've played a king and a down and out fool
Some like it hot, and some like it cool
Do what they want, but don't be their tool
Savor the throne, but don't mind the stool

Take It As It Comes
(Winwood/Jennings)
perf. by Steve Winwood

I figured I haven't flirted with copyright violations for awhile.

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MYSTERY SOLVED!

This question has been bugging me ever since I heard of Wesley Willis: How does a man who whupped Batman's @$$ and whipped Superman's @$$ get taken down by Birdman?

Well, I with the aid of WinMX, I answered that question. Compare...

Batman beat the hell out of me and knocked me to the floor
I got back up and knocked him to the floor
He was being such a jackoff
-from I Whupped Batman's Ass

Superman beat the hell out of me
He knocked me to the floor
I got back up and knocked him to the floor
Superman was being such a roughneck
-from I Whipped Superman's Ass

But here, note the awesome power of Birdman...

Birdman caught me on his property
He saw me trespassing his real estate
He reached into his pocket for a pistol
He came after me and pistol-whipped my behind
-from Birdman Kicked My Ass

Birdman was packin'!!

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AUDIENCE PARTICI... PATION

Regarding memories of John Ritter, a commentor on my post wrote:

the best episode of Three's Company was where Jack had to go to a wedding on some private island, but he was deathly afraid to fly. So his buddy Larry (or was it Janet, I can't remember now it's been so long) gave him a tranquilizer. So he gets to the party and starts drinking, and the combo of liquor and drugs produces this outstanding "performance" of drunken pratfalls, Carmen Miranda imitations and other hilarity. I'd love to see that epi again...

Although I don't exactly remember that episode either, I don't believe Janet would have that kinda dope. If anyone would've had date-rape drugs handy, it would've been Larry.

I don't know if I had a favorite episode of Three's Company, but my two favorite things to see were:

1) Mr. Roper doing his little "Tinkerbell" thing to indicate Jack's (fake) homosexuality.

2) Mr. Furley (sp?) sporting his phat pimp gear. He was the white Superfly, I tell ya!

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BRING ON THE PAIN

My body is attempting to force itself back into my bed as it screams at me "Tae kwon DON'T!" But, I'm still working out. I remember when I trained 4 times a week -- talk about total adrenalin junkie. Well, some endorphines will be good for me right now, I think. Better and cheaper than other forms of self-medication, that's for sure.

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A BLAST FROM MY CYBER-PAST

The first piece of net.decadence I ever engaged in -- no, not pr0n, not 23.5 hour/day marathon chatting, not even carving Blue Ribbon Free Speech campaign .gifs on every page of a website -- was the old (.txt version!) of the Purity Test!

Here is the result of your ACL 400 Point Purity Test.
You answered "yes" to 186 of 400 questions, making you 53.5% sexually pure (46.5% sexually corrupt); that is, you are 53.5% pure in the sex domain.
Your Weirdness Factor (AKA Uniqueness Factor) is 31%, based on a comparison of your test results with 81267 other submissions for this test.

The average purity for this test is 65.1%.
The first submission for this test was received June 17, 1994.

Passing the 50th percentile by the skin of my teeth -- story of my life.

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BANDWIDTH CONSERVATION POST

Here's a new feature I just invented as I sort of lamented that I took part in the sin of forwarding email. No, it wasn't a virus warning, a chain letter, a "read along and scroll to the bottom like the puppet you are" note, or a heart-wrenching piece of urban myth. It was a bunch of funny bits that I've collected over the years across several email accounts that I thought Ms. E would find funny.

"I don't want to sin again," I said to myself. "Yet, how would I disseminate these fine staples of wit and wisdom rivaled only by the scriptures of various religions?"

Then, it hit me. So, without any further ado, the first in a long line of "Bandwidth Conservation Posts."

What Sort of Asian Are You?

YOU KNOW YOU ARE JAPANESE IF...
1. You're obsessed with your hair, your car, and your clothes
2. You want to marry a Korean American or Chinese American woman
(males); or you want to marry a white guy (females).
3. You're afraid of black people.
4. You know you are superior to all other Asians.

YOU KNOW YOU ARE KOREAN IF...
1. You smoke and drink too much.
2. You've got a bottle of Kimchi in your fridge.
3. You're afraid of black people.
4. You know you are superior to all other Asians.

YOU KNOW YOU ARE CHINESE IF...
1. You think you're the smartest people in the world.
2. You have a pager and cellular phone with you at all times.
3. Today's steamed rice is tomorrow's fried rice.
4. You're afraid of black people.
5. You know you are superior to all other Asians.

YOU KNOW YOU ARE VIETNAMESE IF...
1. You eat at restaurants that have "Pho" on their signboards.
2. You have some relative who is Chinese.
3. You're afraid of black people.
4. You know you are superior to all other Asians.

YOU KNOW YOU ARE FILIPINO IF...
1. You want to be a dancer, a singer, or an actor, even though you
have a job as a nurse, a security guard, or an accountant.
2. Some member of your family is a politician or a movie star.
3. You're not afraid of black people; in fact, you wish you were
black.
4. You don't care if you are superior to all other Asians or not,
because being Filipino is cool enough just by itself.

Ed note: #4 -- Daaaaaamn right

YOU KNOW YOU ARE THAI IF...
1. People offer to pay you for sex.
2. No matter what you eat, it's not greasy or spicy enough.
3. You're not afraid of black people, cause in some cases you're
scarier than they are.
4. You know in your heart you'll never be superior to all other
Asians, but you've learned to live with it.

YOU KNOW YOU ARE MALAYSIAN IF ...
1. You don't believe anything the newspapers tell you, but would
never say so in public.
2. The whole world (and George Soros) is out to destroy you and your
country.
3. You would never admit to being afraid of black people, because it
might disrupt racial harmony.
4. You don't think you are superior to other Asians, but your food,
culture, english, humor, etc is.

YOU KNOW YOU ARE SINGAPOREAN IF ...
1. You eat, sleep, smile and have sex according to Government
policy.
2. You don't think Lee Kuan Yew is a facist dictator.
3. Government policy is that you shouldn't be afraid of black
people so you aren't.
4. You know you are superior to all other Asians, cause the
Government says so.

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MY WEEKLY PERSONALITY ANALYSIS

This week's analysis is done as a memoriam to rock star Wesley Willis, whose passing I neglected to mention last month. I wonder what his -- the man who wrote the song I Whupped Batman's Ass -- results would've been?


the joker


WHICH ONE OF BATMAN'S VILLAINS ARE YOU?
brought to you by Quizilla

Y'know, if you search through his album listings, you'll see that he also whupped Robin's @$$, but that Birdman kicked his @$$. What a perfect metaphor for life. Some days, you can take out Batman and Robin. Some days, even Birdman can get the better of you. Deep...

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LOSS OF CHILDHOOD MEMORIES

R.I.P....

The original Man in Black
I was never the biggest country music fan, but c'mon. This dude was everywhere.

Jack Tripper
Was he a "loser" because he didn't score with any of his roommates -- or was that the loveable part of his character?

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ONCE UPON A TIME IN COLUMBUS

Last night was my first real sparring match since I made my martial arts comeback. It was during an individual make-up rank test for a white belt. He was an older guy, I would say in his 30s. Nice guy, but aggressive. He's built exactly like the kind of guy I'm secretly afraid of -- the kind where the pain has to be in direct proportion to the damage I do to stop him.

Personally, I can't stand the thought of dislocating someone's knee with a low roundhouse kick. But I can. The first time I saw the "proper" way to break someone's neck, I felt nauseous. I remember telling one of my instructors, "I don't think I could ever do that." I was told, "If someone did something heinous enough, you'd be surprised."

In any case, I actually landed a controlled, quick, high roundhouse kick to the guy's head! Donnie Yen, look out!

I got in some impromptu kung fu, too. I'm almost up to remembering my green sash stuff. Black sash, here I come. I don't tell too many people at my club this, but personally, I can take my sweet time getting my black belt in TKD. I can hardly wait to get my kung fu back up to par so that I can get that black sash!! Now, both should take me about a year, but still -- here's hoping I'm never forced to choose, because if I do, I'd rather be Wong Fei Hung than Chuck Norris.

Ed. note: This is my first entry using the "Change Time & Date" feature, formerly available only to paying members. I feel like I'm toying with the Laws of Time muahahaha!

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WARNING RECINDED

With a wave of my magic wand (read: the movement of two HTML tags), all posts, regardless of whether there's a separate title field, now look normal. Today's posts are now virtually indistinguishable from anything previous.

How's that for Blogger-geekery?

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WARNING: MINOR FORMAT SNAFU

Well, since I decided to meddle with my template so that I can simply fill in a title field for each post rather than generating my own by adding the appropriate HTML, all posts prior to today's have an extra bit of space between them.

Due to laziness, I will retro-edit only today's posts. Everything prior to today will look funky. I apologize for any inconvenience this may cause.

Ed. note: Ooh, look at that time stamp. Did it really take me a mere 11 minutes to figure out how to solve it all?

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TESTING 1, 2, 3

Looks like Blogger gave all us non-paying squatters some of the stuff that only the paying squatters used to get. I'm trying to figure out how it all works, so forgive me if some of the next few posts look kinda funny.

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TWO YEARS LATER

Yes, I remember exactly where I was and what I was doing when I first heard.

Yes, I was as shocked and angered as most others.

I was then, and am now, personally disturbed at the subsequent changes in our national consciousness.

No, I did not personally lose anyone at Ground Zero or PA, nor do I (to my knowledge) know anyone who has.

So, how has this affected me the most? I would have to say watching and observing the changes in the national consciousness. The ones that made dissent unpatriotic. The ones that made us so willing to accept any story we're given in the name of preventing terrorism.

Are they even looking for WMDs in Iraq anymore? Where's the link? Does anybody really know what time it is? Does anybody really care? Of course not, so long as we can feel a little bit safer with all these logic-defying measures.

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AND OF COURSE...

The time I spent writing that last entry was just a little too much, but enough to make me miss the first few minutes of an episode of the anime Trigun entitled "Paradise." I still have yet to see that episode in its entirety, from start to finish -- dammit.

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ALWAYS LOOK ON THE BRIGHT SIDE OF... OH, WHO AM I KIDDING?

Good points about today: Got some gas in the car, $6 in my pocket, a girl who loves me, and the usual (roof over head, food, etc.) things to be grateful for.

Bad points about today: The depression I'm in having to make literally the choice between which side of the Ninth Circle of Inferno I want to sleep on with respect to my money situation. I hate it when I get this way -- one snag and I want to crawl into my Cancer-ridden (the sign, that is) shell. And all when I have plans and goals to continue to carry out.

There have been more than a few people in my life who've been very supportive of me when I get this way, E being the latest (and the best!). But an ex of mine once pointed out the definite down side to always having to "have your mourning period" whenever something hits hard enough.

To be sure, there are moments when I wish I could mute my emotions enough to keep going in the face of trials. I've found out the hard way that while I'm not the only one in the world who reacts that way, the world doesn't stop while people such as us stop to get ourselves "collected."

All this leaves me wondering just what it'll take for me to "grow up." And how to "grow up." Where's the line between not being numb to your feelings and not being paralyzed by them?

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CH-CH-CH-CHANGES REDUX

Fiddled a bit here and there. I've decided that if those of you I know with blogs allow me, I'll gladly become your link-whore! Comment here, or tag me.

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CH-CH-CH-CHANGES

Isn't it funny how three letters and a dot make the difference between whether or not the enetation .gif loads or not?

I also changed the Audience Participation Question -- not like none of y'all ever answer it or anything. Eh, that's ok.

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ENTER THE...TIGER? DRAGON?

More like "Enter the Wannabe." I had to teach/tutor kung fu class again earlier tonight. I helped my friend relearn a little bit more of his white sash stuff. I've also decided that each week I attend, I'm simply going to focus on one sash's requirements at a time. I made it through 99% of my gold sash stuff. I've got 7 days to review my green sash stuff. At least now I've got two things I didn't have for a long time -- a sparring partner and space. Possibly next week, I'll have some instruction as well.

This was the best part of my day since I had to come back here after leaving E in Athens. I still can't complain too much. But, I do miss her.

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THIS WEEK IN MISCELLANEA

ITEM ONE
Today, I blog from the campus of OU, mooching off their many convenient internet access ports. Since I have a day and a half off of work, I decided to spend some time with E as she begins the new phase of her life as a grad student for the second time. She's really digging her new apartment. It's a nice little space, near campus. It's pretty much set up the way I'd set it up.

Perhaps I've never mentioned (on here) one of the coolest things about this new relationship. It's having found someone who really does have the same outlook on life and how to live it. The ways we've chosen or desired to pattern our lifestyles is eerily similar. We have values and chosen vocations with an eye toward making the world a better place using our individual styles of being. We share similar temperments (good and bad, unfortunately). But, we also enjoy, more or less, similar "little things."

We both enjoy good cups of coffee in good coffee shops. We can listen to NPR during the day and vege out to Logan's Run at night. No Glengarry Glen Ross reference goes unrecognized. We both get excited about martial arts. I can make a Star Trek joke/reference, and it's met with the appropriate response in direct proportion to it's humor, rather than an indirect proportion of retching and eye-rolling. We both get excited about the energy and vibes surrounding college towns.

Such things are important to me. I've spent a good 4 or 5 years of having that importance driven out of me by well-meaning family, friends, a church, and a significant other in the hopes that I'd "grow up." But now, I have in my hands a literal dream come true. This time, I'll be growing up the way I always wanted to. Now, in the eyes of some (particularly those I'm close to in the church I attend -- who will always be my friends), maybe that means I do share the "deficient" values of a bourgeois bohemian. Maybe I do fancy myself to be a member of the community of the creative class.

The implications that has for my spirituality will have to be explored on here another time.

Damn, I've gotten rather deep on this weblog o' mine, huh? Anyway...

ITEM TWO
Somewhere, out of nowhere, people have been popping up out of the woodwork requesting trumpet lessons. One has been interested for awhile. Another showed up last week, and a third I heard about just today. Holy Extra Cash, Batman. But, how much to charge? I want to charge what's fair, considering that I've never taught trumpet lessons. Plus, all my training is generally from playing -- I wouldn't know what constitutes "proper trumpet pedagogy." Well, we'll see how it all works out.

ITEM THREE
Another recent sign of maturity is an increased ability to face, head-on, all of my financial difficulties. I'm learning not to shun bank statements and letters that say things I don't necessarily want to hear. I know that I'm doing the best I can and some months, especially with the way big National City type financial institutions can really screw you over if you allow them to by not being careful...

ITEM FOUR
...and yet the fact remains that I'm $26 in the f**king hole!

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MY WEEKLY PERSONALITY ANALYSIS

You are Scorpion!!

You hate going places, so you make them come to
you! Ah, the benefits of being a demon spectre.
GET OVER HERE!


Which Mortal Kombat Character Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

What I wouldn't give to say "Get over here!" to my remote, cold drink, etc. as I sit on the couch.

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INSIDE JOKE OF THE DAY

I'll be your "Italian Grinder."
  -E.C.

The best pre-lunchtime conversation I've ever had.

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KUNG FU FIGHTING... HUH!

Last Tuesday, I attended my first kung fu class in about 10 months. Now, since I quit, I would try to practice some kung fu on my own -- just like the movies! But it just wasn't the same as attending a class.

So, I show up to find that none of the black sashes showed up, which I'm told is very unusual, but not surprising. Only the chief tae kwon do instructor was there. And though he's a black belt in that, he's only a white sash in kung fu. So, guess who's responsibility it was to hold class? Luckily, he's still a white sash, and I remembered a good 75-80% of those sash requirements. I was able to help him with some of his basics and actually took it on myself (Hmm -- maybe not necessarily a good idea. But I know there's a 90+% chance no one in the school would mind) to teach him the system's fighting form.

It sort of made me smile and remember the irony of being an advanced kung fu student. There was this tacet expectation in the school, I believe, that I would be teaching right now had I not stopped. In fact, I'm told I would've been the fastest rising black belt rather than my friend. It's ok, though -- I'm still the only person to date who double-promoted three times in a row. Anyway, the irony -- if someone would've told me 10 or 20 years ago that I'd be a "kung fu master" (read: instructor), I'd've laughed.

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RANDOM UPDATES

ITEM ONE
Yes, I know I'm getting on TWO weekends behind blogging on my little Adventure. I'll get to it soon. Now, I told you part of the aftermath of that trip. Let me tell you another.

ITEM TWO
For the past few days, I have been in such pain. That's because before we left the Adventure (remember the gas story?), a few of us were messing around. I tried my hand at some (fake) knife fighting and discovered just how effective filipino knife-fighting techniques can be, even if I was almost totally unpracticed in them. E and I saw a couple of people practicing tai chi push hands, and right then I finally declared, "That's it! I'm going back to tae kwon do."

Now, truthfully, my intention was to put it off for about two or three weeks until after E leaves for grad school (see ITEM THREE), but as fate would have it, an email awaited me when I returned.

This person and I tested for 2nd Gup right before I left. But whereas I stopped, he continued and has since gotten his black belt and control of the school! It turns out the chief instructors wanted to keep their school open, but needed this season in their lives to accomplish other things, so they turned it over to my friend. Anyway, it turns out that my name came up in conversation a couple of weeks ago. Now, believe me, it's not my intention to toot my own horn, but in their words, I was viewed as having decent skills and decent ability to teach them to others. So, they track down my old AOHell website and get ahold of me.

Needless to say I took this as a sign from above and jumped my 30-year-old @$$ right back into class last Thursday, and again on Saturday. It took me a bit to relearn what I forgot. And, boy did I hurt. I'm still feeling the after-effects. I've lost tons of flexibility, too, but I think it's just going to have to be regained the same way I gained it in the first place -- one, painful inch at a time.

ITEM THREE
E moves to Athens at the end of the week. At least it's Athens, OH and not Athens, Greece. That does not, however, make the prospect easier.

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